Because every time you allow a predator to attend an event, you oust the people they’ve hurt from that same event. Survivors should not have to remove their names from guest lists in order to avoid trauma. Those who cause trauma should stop causing trauma.
Because all a predator has to do to avoid being ousted is not rape. It’s not that hard. I’ve spent 48 years not raping people, so I can assure you it’s easier than you seem to think.
Because if you don’t like the consequences of your actions, you should have chosen different actions. It’s not for society to absorb your consequences. It’s for you to behave in such a way as to earn positive consequences. Newton’s third law states, “when two bodies interact, they apply forces to one another that are equal in magnitude and opposite in direction.” You chose this magnitude. Living with it is called “being a grownup.”
Because the more consequences you remove from bad actors, the more likely they are to repeat their bad actions. Consequences can and do foster an environment of change.
Because scorpions sting, lions kill, and rapists rape. When you keep predators around, you expose them to countless potential victims. You are, quite literally, giving them a comfortable environment in which to destroy lives.
Because being a part of the kink scene is a privilege, not a right, and because avoiding rape should not be treated as a privilege, but a right. Failing to oust predators from the scene is giving privilege to those who steal other people’s rights.
Because women need safety more than predators need a fun time.
Because when you don’t oust a predator, they assume their actions are acceptable to you.
Because if you live by the sword, you should expect to die by the sword.
Because if you can’t treat people with care and compassion, you haven’t earned the right to be treated with care and compassion.
