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Are you acquainted with your no?

Are you acquainted with your no?

Have you ever considered that your "no" carves space for your deeper "yes" to come to fruition?

“No” is the sword that cuts through the BS to get to what you TRULY want.

And can I tell you a secret?

I used to be so terrified thinking about what I wanted.

Beneath all the ways I would show up and say "yes" to other people and what they wanted… was a deep fear of taking responsibility for my life and my path.

If I assist them I get value out of it, right? 

I feel needed and accomplished when I say yes to them, right?

Sure. Maybe. 

But it begs some questions...

Is it really want you want? 

Or are you trying to please, or prove, or provide some relief from thinking about what you might want?

What happens when we check if our yes is clean and pure... if it is truly sourced in the body, the gut, the heart…?

If it is sourced in something true within you, your yes is a celebration.

But if you feel exhausted, if you're resisting being around people… it may be time to examine where you have said yes and not fully meant it. And it might hurt to look.

But this is the path of becoming a SOVEREIGN human being.

You must learn how precious your "no" truly is.

This is why — more than anything — I practice celebrating the BRAVERY it takes to say no.

We are being hit with stimuli ALL the time.

Media. News. Internet.

Other people's wants and needs.

The things we need to do for xyz endeavor.

Practice saying no.

Or, "not right now, but maybe later."

Or, "no that's not something I want."

Or, "just not feelin' it."

Sometimes your "no" will feel like a hammer coming down furiously. Oftentimes, if we've not said “no” enough, it awakens with FIERECNESS.

And that’s ok.

Sometimes — and with practice — "no" feels easy. Simple. Light.

Whether fiery or feathery, "NO" is SACRED.

"No" is always the profound act of choosing YOU.

"No" is not meant to shut people out and keep you from the world.

(If this ^^ is your relationship to no, and you feel alone and disconnected often, maybe exploring "yes" is more your jam at the moment...)

Regardless of where you are with your no, I invite you to consider…

What in this season can you say no to?

And what is the greater yes waiting beneath that?

What wants to die and fall away in your life, in your psyche, in your habits? What no is right there for you to claim in your every day life or relationships?

Will your no be blunt? Or soft? Can you play with both manifestations of no?

Can your no be benevolent? Can it be a blessing?

Tell me what you discover, or what this inspires in you…

What you’re saying “no” to…

…I’d love to hear about it.

xo,

A.M.

Photo by Tashi Negron

Are you acquainted with your no?

Comments

Mhmm.. you said it. Familiarizing ourselves with our "yes" and our "no" is such important work...

Allyssa

I love this piece. So many of us treat MAYBE as YES, and wind up doing things that we don't want, or worse that leave us damaged. MAYBE means you have not spent the time in your soul to understand your motivations or needs. MAYBE means NO. If it's YES, it should be that full throated YEEEEEEESSSSS! This thinking has changed my life.

Strato Man


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