Project Retrograde

"Look on the bright side Misa-chan! You look so cute in those."

Misato couldn't help feeling that this was not much of a consolation given the situation. She toyed with the hem of her shirt to busy her hands and occupy them anywhere besides the embarrassing underwear she had found herself suddenly confined to wearing. The only thing she could stomach less than wearing protection was being chided by her best friend for being unable to keep her hands off it like a child. She frowned as Ritsuko poured herself a drink at the counter in a svelte black evening dress, and her cheeks burned with the awareness of how fitting that awful feeling of childishness suited the difference between the two of them right now.

She was shocked at the initial sight of her best friend's apartment and even now found herself daunted by the interior. Misato's own apartment had always been messy and drab by comparison, whereas Ritsuko who was arguably just as busy with work at NERV had an amazing, tidy apartment and made it seem effortless to do so. This is what a responsible adult's apartment looks like, she noted to herself with a dose of chagrin she didn't dare let her blonde friend catch wind of. It was already bad enough, with the sudden massive changes between the two her..."situation" had caused.

"You look distressed, Misa-chan. I can get you something to drink to help with those butterflies in your stomach if you like." Ritsuko smiled at her in a way that made Misato feel two feet tall. "Non-alcoholic, of course. Alcohol might interfere with your body's new chemistry. I didn't know which kind was your favorite, so I bought a few different kinds of juice."

"I don't want juice!" Misato whined in a tone far less dignified than she intended and quickly regathered herself, simmering at the entertained grin Ritsuko broke into at the outburst. She didn't see how a little alcohol could be any worse than what had already happened to her. She swallowed to remove the lump in her throat as unwanted memories thrust themselves into the forefront of her mind: ruined futons, embarrassing trips to the laundry room with nothing to cover up her rear but some soaked panties. Ritsuko had diagnosed the symptoms almost immediately as side effects of the procedure Misato found herself an unwilling participant in. She might have found the fact that Ritsuko had already prepared a package of protective undergarments suspicious if she hadn't been so flummoxed and ashamed. A grown woman at her age, wetting the bed! And it had only gotten worse. She had nearly wet herself at work the other day and had glumly had to accept Ritsuko's recommendation to remain full time in...

"How are your diapers?" Ritsuko asked. Misato had to suppress a yelp; she hadn't noticed her cross the room until her friend's fingers were obtrusively slipped into the waistband of her diapers without even so much as a warning. She broiled with fury, but her desire to mouth off at this invasion of privacy was overriden by the shameful reality that throwing a tantrum wouldn't do anything to improve her situation.

"They're fine, thank you very much! I think I'm capable of knowing when I have an accident." Misato did her best to keep the trepidation out of her voice at the awful truth; she was stuck in diapers for the time being until she could finally keep her pants dry again.

"I know, I was just checking." Ritsuko cooed in a tone that made Misato bristle at its dismissive, soothing character. "As your physician, I have to monitor your situation." She wrapped a reassuring arm around her diaperstuck friend and toyed with her hair. "And as your friend, I just want the best for you. You know that, right, Misa-chan?"

Misato felt Ritsuko's embrace and tried to hold back the fluttering feeling in her chest. Almost as unbearable as being trapped in diapers was how miniscule she suddenly felt around her best friend, who had annoyingly been acting more and more like an overbearing older sister. And she couldn't help feeling that this was an appropriate way to look at it, since she was constantly forced to compare herself - a grown woman needing to wear diapers again, standing awkwardly in the middle of her friend's apartment waiting to be sent to her room in nothing but a t-shirt and noisome, crinkly pampers - to her friend, dolled up to the nines in an elegant evening dress that emphasized every curve of her body. She still couldn't process the idea that Kaji wanted to see Ritsuko after hours. What could they possibly have to discuss?

"You can stay out here and say goodnight to him, if you want." Ritsuko offered as if reading her thoughts.

"N-no! Absolutely not! He can't see me in this condition; I'd never live it down." 

"Whatever you say, Misa-chan. Are you sure you don't want some juice?"

Misato sighed and stared at the front of her cushy, padded undergarments. The bright pastels and cutesy, ridiculous cartoon rabbit print just reminded her of how far she had fallen. She at least had to make the best of a bad situation and it was kind of Ritsuko to shoulder the burden of helping her out.

"...Fine. I want melon-flavored." She just hoped she didn't have to take it in a sippy cup.

------- Several months later ---------

"Hurry up, Misato," Ritsuko called from the doorway. "We're going to be late again." 

"Can't we just go? Why do we have to wait on her every time?" Asuka asked, her arms thrown across her chest as one foot irritably tapped the floor. 

"Jeez, Asuka, cut her a break..." Shinji mumbled noncommittally, all too familiar with being on the receiving end of the redhead's awful attitude. 

"Hah! She can't keep her bed dry and I'm supposed to just deal with it making us late every day?" she scoffed and tossed her hair back as she leveled her gaze at him. 

"S-sorry..." stammered a familiar and yet strangely high-pitched voice. 

The bedroom door at the far end of the apartment slid open, revealing Misato. Or at least, what was left of her. The girl, barely old enough to be called a tween, tugged awkwardly at her socks as she hobbled after the three. The scrawny frame draped in a children's school uniform and topped with two bobbing pigtails looked nothing like the confident, buxom commander they used to know. If it weren't for the purple hair and big brown eyes, nobody would have recognized the shy, awkward twelve-year-old girl as the former NERV employee Katsuragi Misato.

Asuka had already charged out by the time Misato had made it to the door. Shinji gave her a sympathetic look before he followed, leaving Misato and Ritsuko temporarily alone. Misato shifted awkwardly, keenly aware of the vast height difference between the two now and how her former friend and co-worker loomed over her. 

"So, how are we feeling about our second week back to school?" Ritsuko mused, letting her hand rest gently on her charge's shoulder.

"You know exactly how I feel about it..." The purple haired tween muttered in a clear sulk, biting her lip. She had spent the entire morning furiously trying to arrange her outfit just so to disguise the worst part of her situation. She had given up trying to even pass as being mature as she once was; whatever was affecting her had erased every trace of her former womanhood and left a rangy little girl in its place. Even worse, she found herself slipping back even further - some nights she found herself sucking her thumb without realizing it. And the way Ritsuko dressed her up like some sort of doll was too much to stand. But she couldn't do anything about it; her former friend overpowered her easily, and she couldn't stand the idea of getting turned over the older woman's lap and spanked in front of everyone like last time. Her grip on her cute schoolbag tightened, and she hoped nobody could see the blush cloaking her face. She resisted the urge to tear up and suck on her thumb. 

"Oh, and you'll be happy to know I let the school nurse know about your 'little problem'. If you need to get changed, just go to her office." The blonde scientist chimed helpfully, giving her a patronizing pat on the head.

"WHAT?!" Misato blurted out furiously, daring to look her new caretaker in the eye with her face a lovely shade of embarrassed scarlet.

"Ah ah, watch your tone. I could have just sent you to daycare as we discussed." 

Misato burned with shame. How could she do this to her? Worse yet, she couldn't shake off the nauseating comfort that behaving brought. Even her little outburst just now set her on the verge of a crying fit. What was happening to her? Unconsciously, she tugged at the hem of her uniform's skirt that hid her embarrassing, crinkly underpants. Unfortunately, there didn't seem to be anything to do about the obvious bulge they made in her profile or the fact that Ritsuko had taken over her life completely. It seemed much easier to just be a good girl, and she hated how much the idea pleased her. 

"...Yes, Miss Akagi..."