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Bedtime Stories #5 - Fences & Funerals

Loooopy dougnutssss

*yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn*

nitey night!

There are a fair few Bedtime Stories track here on Patreon.  Click the tag to hear them!

If you'd like the whole collection ye can check out   

Amazon: https://amzn.to/332tKRu or iTunes: https://apple.co/2raB1S1 

Bedtime Stories #5 - Fences & Funerals

Comments

Just listened to this one in bed and I laughed out loud so many times...sometimes in a shaking my head & covering my face way πŸ˜‚πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™€οΈ and sometimes in a β€œokay that’s actually really funny” way. That was a nice ending to the day. Also, I make a rhyme every time. πŸ€“

The ninja of sleeping πŸ˜‚. I just found #5πŸ₯°. This month is just starting out so well. You have no idea how much you’ve helped me the last several months. If you stopped recording altogether at this point in time, as sad and devastating that would be, it’s enough. You have audios that help me on so many levels that I could listen to on repeatβ™₯️. Thank you for blessing us by sharing your gift. One day I will try to put it in words, just how beautiful it is to me, but since it’s bedtime it will have to wait. Forehead kisses and so many hugs, Your not so secret, loyal listening, happy sleeping, empath learning, extrovert pretending, Admirer, H -`ღ´-

That funeral-joke-to-ear-kiss transition was swift and deadly. I went from "OMG what a cornball" to "HNNGGGHHHH" so fast I thought I was having a stroke at first...

Punishing me with ear licking. Soo cruelπŸ˜‚

Mimmie Pedersen

ME TOOπŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜

Betty G.

I want those spankings XD

He is so sweet when he wants to ignore his erection hahahaha. I LOVE THIS ONE ❀❀❀

You ~ didn’t ~ laugh ~ at ~ my ~ joke ~

Betty G.

This was lovely. The bad jokes were amazing and the asmr stuff was making me squirm so thanks for that πŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆ also stay safe in the hurricane. I hope all is well

Stay safe Gael. A storm is coming to Ireland. I'm worried for all the Irish lovelies.

I love the bedtime stories series. Whenever I have a hard time sleeping, these audios make me feel so safe and relaxed. Before I know it, I'm knocked out. I love this one in particular bc it was a good balance of teasing and silliness. Also, my weakness is ear play 😍 Keep them coming sweetie and thank you as always for a good night's sleep 😘😘

Kristine

Just listened today here at work. These kinds of audios are the true challenge! The erotic ones I can poker face my way through but there's no hiding the goofy grin I get or the goosebumps and shivers from the kisses. Those up close kisses and whispers are just devastatingly good 😘😘😘

Kathy M

yep, i'm with you ladies!

Good heavens! The tingles and good shivers I got on the right side of my body.Ohhh that was remarkable.Also I adore hearing your voice.

Meghan McDonald

Gurl I am there with you!!!! This was 10 10 10 all the 10s yes honey! πŸ™ŒπŸ»

GOOD GAWD, THAT FELT AMAZING!!!! The tone of your voice with that 3D mic, are completely ASMR-GASMIC!!!! You had my scalp, neck, shoulders and back tingling so much, and it actually felt like you were only millimeters away from my neck! Then to top it off, you had the nerve to tickle my corny funny bone! YOU'RE LETHAL, I TELL YA, JUST LETHAL!!!! ❀️❀️❀️

Do you EVER run out of goofy stories!?!?.....its law in Ireland im guessing πŸ˜‚ loved this audio, thank you x

One of my most sensitive spots are my ears, I can't even have people whisper in them without laughing and pulling away. The ear licks got to me. I loved this very much.

I am fresh out of heartfelt superlatives, but I do adore this audio. Comments about the audio quality are spot on - perfect volume and spatial for super close in. My right ear thanks you for the kisses. My right cheek has requested that I no longer giggle at the jokes. May you have passionate love into your late 70s and beyond without risk of electrocution. Mwah.

Ahh, nothing better than coming home from a long evening to snuggle up with some of your loopy bedtime stories. Where you come up with these corny jokes is beyond me, but I'm glad you find them. Of course, I giggle, more at your loopy telling than the punchline, though. LOL And the sound work on this one -- much closer and more clear, felt very real. Whatever levels/filter you are using, or maybe mic placement, is working beautifully. Thank you for the smiles and for helping me drift off to sleep! *hugs*

Surely you enjoy laughing, my Queen! Do you have any amazing lizard jokes for us?<br><br><img height="190" src="https://www.walldevil.com/wallpapers/u11/smiling-lizard.jpg">

You know, thereΒ΄sss just one thing in bed even more worsse than crisp crumbssss... And that are jokessss... *hissssesss and slithers away like a streak* This Patreon place is giving me the shiversss today...

I needed that, happy and silly is always good when depression is beating me up

I always love a good bedtime story - this was EXACTLY what I needed after a very long day myself 😍❀️😍❀️

This was so cute, I need another 5 of these like... right now. 😍

I love your bedtime stories 😍 Your voice is so relaxed and so sexy, I love how grainy it is when your loopy. Thank you for this Gael😘

Well, fuck. If that's what happens for not laughing at your jokes, I nay have to consider never doing it again. That is some ear nuzzling goodness! "It served him right for fighting with his girlfriend." Could you get any more adorable? This is why so many women love you, G. You always take our side. XD πŸ’šπŸ’‹

You're such a cuddly puppy, Gael. I wanna squeeze you too. The position here was lovely. I love being the little spoon. AND i will never EVER laugh at your jokes again, if that means more whispers and ear nuzzles. Sleep well. πŸ˜™πŸΆ

It's perfectly acceptable to listen to this at 5.20am, right? Right.

My dad grew up on a dairy farm and his parents used an electric fence to stop some of their animals from wandering too far. One day my grandfather caught a young boy from town playing near the electric fence, so he told him to go play somewhere else or else he might accidentally get shocked if he got too close.<br><br>In what one could only presume was an act of defiance, the little boy waited until my grandfather walked away before proceeding to urinate on the electric fence. And as my dad tells the story, "I heard this scream from out in the field. My father and I ran out to see what happened and we saw the little boy passed out on the grass with his pants down. He looked like he actually had some kind of burn to his pecker, so we had to drive him into town to take him to the doctor. I don't know what ended up happening, but from that day forward, not a single child ever went near that electric fence again!"<br><br>Since urine has electrolytes and electric fences are a bit high off the ground, the urine might still be in a stream when it makes contact with the fence (as opposed to being dispersed into droplets). Apparently there was a case of a 15 year old boy who actually received enough electric current when he peed on a high voltage fence that <b><i>his subsequent electrical burn caused the amputation of his penis and 3 of the fingers on his left hand.</i></b> (See <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/store/10.1111/j.1464-410X.2008.08343.x/asset/j.1464-410X.2008.08343.x.pdf;jsessionid=42564326EB60B7770A963D8BF2954F65.f03t01?v=1&amp;t=j8i5whl3&amp;s=1c15b379b9331142284e8c9a333a00a66f4b9957" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/store/10.1111/j.1464-410X.2008.08343.x/asset/j.1464-410X.2008.08343.x.pdf;jsessionid=42564326EB60B7770A963D8BF2954F65.f03t01?v=1&amp;t=j8i5whl3&amp;s=1c15b379b9331142284e8c9a333a00a66f4b9957</a> on page 3 of 12 for the NSFW pictures of his injury 😡)<br><br>So there you have it, boys and girls! If you're a fan of the cock, don't risk getting a shock! ☝️😧

Oooh love a loopy Gael! Especially one that rains those special ear licks and kisses and squeezes me like Charmin! You are an exceptional "horrible'' joke teller! I must say your arenal is vast. I love it! Such a goof. And I'll take those "punishments" all day/night long!! Night, looney tunes!

Loved this one Gael! There was something so comforting about the breathing at the end! I didn't want it to end!! ❀️

Same! Wth is that all about? How can the sound of breathing be so mesmerizing?! Boggles my mind.

Laura

Well this just made my bedgasm even better! That sexy bedtime bass in your voice unraveled me! 😜 The kisses, the spooning, *shivers*. Not to mention I think my right ear just fell in ❀️! Epic fail on the spankings but I'll try again tomorrow night and let's see what happens!! πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ’‹

Love a loopy Gael! So adorable. Especially one that rains licks and kisses in all of my "spots"

Those ear kisses tho made me hot and startled.πŸ˜³β€οΈπŸ’“ I almost fell down the stairs because my legs got weak. Always gotta kill em’ with sexiness, I seeπŸ˜πŸ˜†

Carolina

I could literally listen to hours of just Gael breathing. ❀️

I love that I can hear your lips pursing so it sounds like you’re cooing. It’s literally the cutest and sexiest thing about you.πŸ˜˜πŸ’—πŸ’•β€οΈβ˜ΊοΈ

Carolina

As one who has endured a colonoscopy, I can verify Doc's assertion.

Oh, I love the "doctors at a funeral" joke! I first heard it about 4-5 years ago at (not surprisingly) a cardiologist's office. But the version I heard had a proctologist of unknown ethnicity as the laughing doc, not an Irish gynecologist 😝<br><br>(I suppose deciding which is the filthier of the two versions comes down to personal preference, but I would much rather be the proctologist myself 😷)<br><br>Are you using different settings or a different technique when you record with the 3Dio compared to past audios? Because even though I was listening with a $4 pair of earbuds, this was the most realistic sounding audio (in an ASMR sort of way) that I've ever heard 😯 So much so that at 4:21 (aka the<i>"Hey, I'mma get all up in your left ear and kiss and breathe into it!"</i> part), I was so startled that I <del>gracefully melted in a swoon</del> reflexively jerked forward and banged my forehead against the wall right next to my bed πŸ€• But fear not, for the quarter-sized goose egg above my left eyebrow is really just masking the temporary blow to my pride and sense of social propriety! πŸ€“πŸ‘<br><br>Now, getting spanked for <i>not</i> laughing at the corny jokes might teach someone a lesson. But I think the biggest punishment would be having to choose between laughing at the jokes/enjoying the merriment and getting the <i>D'aww, that's really sweet</i> ear nuzzles/miscellaneous cuddling 😱 <i>That</i> is the proverbial caught-between-a-rock-and-a-hard-place scenario.<br><br>Overall, I take my hat off to you for this fine audio! 12/10 people would enjoy this recording more than a colonoscopy or speculum exam! πŸ₯‡<br><br>(<b>Edit:</b> And how could I forget? Bonus points for the one-sided dialogue with your willy! Willy conversations are the best conversations! πŸ˜ŽπŸ‘)

Oh, yes, sir, I have been shocked by an electric fence in my timeβ€”twice, actually. Same damn fence, now I think about it. Once when I was a kid, I straightened up too quickly ducking under to get to the other side and caught it across my back. I managed to make it back to the house, but I collapsed when I got there and lay around for probably an hour until I felt well enough to stand again. But before that, I hadn't even been born yet and got shocked by the electric fence. My mother had just closed the electric fence behind her and the dog came along after. The dog's tail caught the fence and pulled it forwardβ€”right into the back of her bare legs. She was probably 8 months pregnant at the time. 🀣 (Side note: It's really strange to "feel" covers shifting and mattresses creaking when I'm sitting on my couch. πŸ˜†)

Nobody tells a bedtime story like you do Gael!! It was just what I needed. Good night Sweetness!! Have a good Sunday. We have dad's 90th birthday party and family coming from Arkansas and Colorado. It will be a blast I'm sure.

I didnt even get 2 minutes in becaue I just diedπŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ’€ at 1:05!!! G, you're killing me with this Ear love!!!

I didn't want this audio to end omg so far my fave out of the bedtime stories saga. This was actually perfect now what would be more perfect is a wake up audio aswell where you are denying telling those awful jokes!! Oh and you can spank all you like. I just might enjoy my punishment 😜 oh and you talked to your.... To your..... Weapon of mass distraction like!! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ the most adorable guy on the scene. Night night don't let the electric fence bite ❀️❀️

I'd probably be safe from those "punishments" because I couldn't stop smiling. You're just so adorable when you're loopy X3!

Just finished it. Sweet, goofy, sexy, soothing, relaxed and realistic. That's why I love bedtime stories so much! PS: electric fences....Electric fences!! (Was It Electric or Electrical?? Ahahah)

Yay, Bedtime Stories! My most favorite thing in the whole wide world, made even more tingly than usual with the addition of your close whispers, ear blowing, and ear kisses.πŸ˜™ They are the surest way to help lull me to sleep. However, I love your adorably sleepy voiced jokes and stories so much, I fear I wouldn't receive any of those delightful punishments. I can hold the laughter in.πŸ˜‰ Goodnight love, sweet dreams.😚❀

Perfect timing 😍😍Good night people ❀️

Greek Goddess

I heart story time.

Loopy Gael is so adorable 😍 Thanks for sharing your adorable loopy self 😏 Good night, and sweet dreams 😚

Sweet dreams, G πŸ’—

Thank you for this. I feel really better now😳😍

Thanks G🌺 πŸ’‹studying night for me btw sooo saving it as a🍭 (#motivationalaudioπŸ’ͺ🏽) Good night G and lovelies πŸ’žπŸ’ž

Perfect timing indeed - my favourite series. Thank you!πŸ˜™πŸ’• Good night, gute Nacht, everyone!

Laura

πŸ™‰πŸ™‰

Nah I don't like your jokes 😍 now punish me!

Good night my lovely Barbara...

Merci G, douce nuit Γ  toi et Γ  mes chΓ¨res merveilleuses sirΓ¨nes πŸ˜šπŸ’–

Perfect timing..just got into bed!! Nite-nite.. G and Lovelies!!! πŸ˜΄πŸ˜΄πŸŒ›πŸŒ›

Nikki-Nik

It's 01:03 am here. Just in time G.! I Hope they'll help me doing nice dreams (even if from the title i'm not so sure ahahah)

Nighty night, G! Pleasantest of dreams, and thank you for more stories! πŸ˜šπŸ’•

I have the worst headache right now, this is gonna make it go away. Goodnight ❀❀

Catherine

Goodnight lovely Gael, sleep well 😘

Gillian Cann

Looking forward to bedtime! Goodnight G! πŸ˜™ Thanks for the looooopiness! πŸ˜‰

Yay! I look forward to listening to this tonight. 😻

Mister M.

Goodnight, G! πŸ’‹ Thank you for sharing your silly, sleepy self with us! πŸ’•

Laura

Good night love. Sweet dreams! 🎧❀️

Wldgrl


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