⛥September Q&A⛥

Thank you for posting your questions. I've been having a bit of a nothing-goes-right-everything-fails-miserably-life-wants-me-to-give-up-on-it episode this past week so I'm comfort eating with some fresh homemade cookies and -- *takes a big frustrated gulp* -- a second cup of coffee. 

Answering your questions is never not fun so don't be afraid. Believe it or not, I actually enjoy being asked questions about myself. Just another need I was denied in childhood. These posts are very therapeutic for me. Let's roll them out.

Is it Die Nutella or Das Nutella? Der, die, das... Despite having a legitimate elementary school education in German, I just go with what sounds right. Das Nutella. It's a pretty gender neutral spread. Non-binary. Unlike honey, which is decidedly male - probably because of how runny and sticky it is. Butter is decidedly female, probably because of how soft and mushy- ...you get the point. So if you meet a Nutella in Germany, make sure to use the gender neutral pronoun. Male for honey. Female for butter. (Yes, any kind of butter.)

Do you have difficulty saying things like Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday to people? I can't be the only one. I don't talk to people so I don't know what would be difficult about it. Usually if someone says something to me first, I just say the same thing back out of sheer politeness. If it's someone's birthday somewhere in my comments I just say happy birthday, usually makes them happy. I forget everyone's birthday though except the person I'm dating. Do not rely on me to remember your birthday on my own. I think I forgot my cousin's birthday even though I saw her and/or talked to her the day before, three years in a row. If it's your birthday you gotta tell me the same day. In fact, I occasionally remember my father's birthday but it's close to Jack's birthday so it kinda gets drowned out. Meh, he doesn't celebrate since he's become ultra spiritual so I think I can get away with just ignoring it like I do my mother's. 

How did you get into Witchcraft? The same way 99.9% of witches get into witchcraft. Just felt drawn to it in my early teens. 

Do you have a favourite perfume (because you showed some in the last 'Caring Friend Explaines' video) or does it change depending on mood, season, ...? I don't have a favorite perfume or what I would call a signature perfume yet. I like all the ones I own but so far I've found nothing that's "me" enough to start identifying with it. One of the things on my bucket list though is collecting every single BPAL perfume. Maybe there's one there that fits me. 

Do you and Avery still read the same books together? And if yes, which book are you reading right now? We haven't really had time to read anything. Might aswell cancel my library membership, though I think it's long expired. 

Oh, and did you succeed in fixing your washer? I haven't had the time to try yet. But I might if I get fed up enough with people touching my stuff at the laundromat. Oh, you need my dryer for your stupid crap ton of laundry from whatever dumb kind of business you run so you can occupy every single machine for hours on end every Tuesday morning? Good for you. Hands off my stuff. Especially if it's not entirely dry yet. You obnoxious dumb fuck. I hope I never have to see your audacious annoying face again.

Sorry if I ask a question you already answered in the past. So if you could go anywhere in the world for a vacation where would you go? You don't have to apologize for double asking. If you don't know, you don't know. Besides, as time passes answers can change. For example, I'd like to vacation in Japan but if I go to Japan and cross off that experience, I might want to go somewhere else. Or maybe my priorities change based on acute needs, like right now I could really use a vacation at a pristine private beach, no people, just endless vibrant turquoise water to play and have sex in. Just so long as it isn't camping, fuck that shit. 

How did you meet Jack? Wow, this was the only question with two likes, you guys are serious about that one. Ok shit is about to get real. Jack found my ASMR at work and eventually also found my old vlog channel. When I was going through a rough time he decided to reach out and offer help. I instantly felt the connection we have - I got lots of similar messages but only with him did it feel like, wow, this guy understands me. I never add people I don't know to my steam - he was the exception to the rule. My steam is reserved for my closest friends and I wanted him in there. We didn't really talk for a while until my ex stood me up one night (4th of July) and I stayed up drinking and chatting with him. Everything about him was so pleasant from the start. He gave me more attention than my ex, who lives on the same block. I learned that he's a witch with great taste in music and a little later I learned that he's exceptionally attractive. I was never interested in dating guys but sure enough, I wanted him. A little bit of time passed with me trying to make it work with my ex and I realized I wanted only him. I didn't want to share him (except between us), I didn't want anyone else touching him and I would still claw someone's eyes out if they so much as made a move at him. Now, I thought I just wasn't the possessive type, but I now know I just didn't give a fuck about the other people I dated. I give many fucks about Jack. All the fucks he wants, in fact. Ha. But this is how I found true love in my darkest times. 

What are the specifications of the laptop you use to render your videos? Like cpu, memory graphics, etc. Just curious because it seems to take a very long time to render videos.  Intel(R) Core(TM) i5-5200U CPU @ 2.20 GHz  2.20 GHz, 8GB RAM, Intel(R) HD Graphics 5500, NVIDIA GeForce 840M -- if that answers your question. I just copied all the computer terms I could find. Yes, I have two graphics cards, though the Sims only work with the Intel one. 

Do you have any tips for being in a rut with witchcraft? Yassss gurl, I know what you mean on such an intimate level. Life gets so busy yet not practicing leaves me so fucking miserable, like I have no sense of purpose. I know a few things that help ease back into it. You don't have to cast a spell every day (unless you're me and still have a bunch of amulets to work on... sorry) and it shouldn't feel like a chore as that defeats the purpose. I only cast spells personally when I'm inspired because then I have the energy to back what I'm trying to create. But it helps to just casually introduce occult things back into your life. 

• Sage/bless your home. This can give you a fresh start by clearing the residual energy that keeps you stuck. 
• Clean/decorate your altar. It looks the same as 3 seasons ago? Change it up. Place some new crystals, burn fresh incense and set an intention. When something is nice and neat, you're more likely to want to use it. 
• Clean/charge your crystals. I don't do this often enough for an obscene lack of moonlight in my country and otherwise lacking energy. But when you have strong, charged crystals, you can find ways to use them everyday, like absorbing their energy to stimulate yours or wear them for healing and immunization. 
• Spend time alone in nature. I enjoy going for walks because being surrounded by trees grounds me and brings me back to myself, and myself is a magical being who enjoys manipulating energy. 
• Get inspired. Learn some spells you don't know yet, even if you're not ready to cast. If you find something you want to make happen, make a sigil for it. Learn about crystals you've never worked with, follow some witch accounts on instagram, learn about herbs and how to use them in ways you haven't before. Buy a book. New information always helps get things going. 
• Put yourself first. If you care about your wellbeing you will naturally start taking care of yourself on all levels. No magic is upstream, magic is downstream. Taking care of yourself is downstream. Therefore, the more downstream things you do, the more magic will flow back into your life. An important part of "put yourself first" is, don't hold yourself back. I'm saving for a big move so I can tell you all about holding myself back. Buy a deck of oracle cards you've been wanting to get and draw a daily card. Buy some new crystals that help with your desires. Have them delivered to your door or something so you don't have to do more than some cozy online shopping - but if you want something, let yourself have it. You don't have to go crazy but also don't jam the natural flow of things. Another important part of "put yourself first" is, take yourself seriously. If you're anything like me and no one took you seriously, like, ever, it can be a bit of a task to learn how. I personally find that I never write things down because I can't do it perfect enough to consider it worth doing. I recently bought two little paperblanks on offer that I'm looking forward to filling with stuff that's personal to me. They're black velvet and gorgeous and it always helps me to, besides writing, doodle over the pages and make them as aesthetically pleasing as possible. That way it feels more justified being there and it helps me connect with myself. Write down quotes that mean a lot to you, recipes you really like, dreams you've had that you can't forget, poems, anything that makes you feel. This will help you connect with yourself and having something tangible in reality that's an expression of your true self helps with feeling like you exist in reality and in turn helps you acknowledge and honor yourself. 

Aside from Nightwish, do you listen to any kinda-sorta similar bands like Delain or Epica, or "northern-inspired" music like Heilung or Shireen? I've sampled many, but so far none have had the "right sound" I'm going for so didn't "stick". Either I don't like the vocalist, or it sounds too flat, or it sounds too mainstreamized, or it's just unstructured noise. I always appreciate recommendations though, that's how you eventually find stuff you like, too. I know that I tend to prefer complex musical pieces like from the old school Nightwish and Type O Negative over just screaming over a guitar or vaguely-meant-to-sound-deep lyrics over a distinctly modern beat. Not many have that "something" that keeps me interested. 

This only took me forever to do lol. I hope you enjoyed my answers and save your questions for next week's Q&A post. I have a new video rendering for you that might be available tomorrow night, if not the next day. I'm making multiple versions again so no music/no ambience will be added next week aswell. Sorry this is taking so long, I really wish it didn't. I just want to give you the best possible quality is all. I hope you are well and ready for October! 

//Ally