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Revolution Chapter 4

Gabriel continues deliveries and trouble finds him once again. Only this time he is way in over his head!

Comments

I like this take actually. I don't think it was intentional but I will admit there were two ways I saw the story going. Gabriel builds a life for himself in the Forsaken Realm, and tries to lift the people up through hard labor over time.

I totally agree with Sage Berthelsen... But anyway, I'm loving it, continue it...

Arthur Fernandes Souza

I like these four chapters. I like them but I think you should try to use them as a guideline. There’s so much character development that could’ve happened between the chapters. I’m seeing the four as highlights to a full book (200-300 pgs). Depending on how you’d space the timeline out you could continue with him being a glass cannon or a Jack of All. This setting is really fun to read in my opinion cause the magic system is hardcoded with weaknesses. No matter what you do with this it was a great read!

Sage Berthelsen


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