PATREON EXCLUSIVE: How To Handle It When Your Girlfriend Spends Time With A Male Friend

What if the friendship is based on a common goal? Do you still think there is low chance not having sexual desire in this case?

Liandra

I'm bisexual too. Most my friends are guys (my hobbies and work are male dominated). Funnily my male partners were never as jealous as my female partners.

Liandra

My ex (for 3 weeks) always gained male attention and she responded in friendly way. Often did she have make contacts and it sometimes bothered me. I did not tell her all the time not to talk to any men. Moderation is what I expected, but she had too many and too fast got into contact. I let her meet guys, as she was new in the place and wanted to make connections. And usually she explained how she got to know them etc. But when I asked her to meet together her male friends, she always found a reason not to. Most which is, that her friends did not want to see me. That was quite respectless for me and a first red flag. Also she always got to know more guys than girls. It always baffled me how little she needed to get a male into he friendzone. If I approached a woman for genuine human connection, they were often clear about no desire to talk to me. When they had a partner, they stated it and cut it right there off. But my ex just let it come in. Sure it wasn´t sexual approaches to her, but it was too much for me. So I started to develop a grudge, as she did not seem to understand moderation. Out of grudge I made a "preemptive strike" and hit on a girl with sexual intention. It was a mistake, but it always daunted me, that there would something happen and I did not want to be an idiot. So... at the end of the relationship, she left me and got straight to fuck her "new best friend". As she said she always held back for me but I did not appreciate it. I can tell, she had always many more male than female contacts and I can´t recall she had a real female best friend. Always males. Guess what? I was her best friend, too, before the relationship started many years ago. So for the future, I will be looking very closely what ratio of gender her friendzone has. Also at that time with my cheating preemptive strike, she was also often hanging out with a guy she called "perfectly hot". Just in this moment, my ex is in my bed. We are not physical. She came to me, asking, if we want to restart the relationship of 5 years. I declined, as she does not agree to my conditions.

The chance of platonic relationship between man and woman is so low that it's better for you to think that it's impossible. There is always a sexual desire at least on one side. And as to women most of them don't understand the meaning of the word friendship anyway.

Vitalii Stepchenko

But we (my ex/father of my daughter and I) just had a mutual male friend over for dinner last night. Whenever it's a mutual friend, it makes it a lot easier. Even though my ex and I are only co-parenting together, I'm still careful about showing him respect about who I hang out with, simply because he is still sheltering me and taking care of me financially.

It truly depends. I'm bisexual, so it would get pretty annoying if the person I was with was jealous every single time I went out with my friends lol.... But I also try to only talk to most my guy friends on the phone or online, rather than hanging out in person, just because it's true, many of them want to sleep with me, and that turns me off from hanging out with them in person anyway, whether I'm single or in a relationship.

I think the more specific the type of woman you're looking for as a long term partner the easier it is to be friends with other women. You know what you want long term and so can appreciate women for who they are as people without trying to date them all.

Steven

Can you expand on this James? Might be a good video topic AG

Steven

Well, many times, the guy won't AMOG you but instead strategically try to become your friend to increase his chances of some alone-time with your girl.

Good advice!

Margaret

Women do (or should do) most of the pursuing in a relationship; men are the gatekeepers of relationships, women are the pursuers. What do people think about backing off a bit and seeing if the woman still pursues you? If less effort is put into being with a male friend than is put into locking the boyfriend down, or ensuring that he remains locked down, then that might be a clarion call in and of itself. Don’t bother expending the energy of trying to determine if she’s has or is going to cheat. Catch her behavior as soon as it manifests. Have a talk with her and tell her that you can see that her interest in being with you does not match her interest in being with her friend. Calibrate your response to the situation and to your liking. You might choose to break up, or just letting her know that you see the disparity, then back off and do your own stuff. If she thinks you’re a keeper let her demonstrate it and let her see that she needs to earn her position in your life. All this might best be done against the backdrop of having already discussed these issues at the point at which you agree to exclusivity, as Alisha said.

Todd McDaniels

Sound advice. If a girl seems uncomfortable with her boyfriend meeting a male friend or hanging out with them— definitely need to get to the bottom of it ASAP.

Great video and tbh I'd advise people to talk about male/female friendships and boundaries at the start of the relationship to avoid any problems later down the line xxx

Alisha