A Rejected Video

love your content, nice work guys ♥

I can see why it was cut. I feel like more than anything else, it lacks a bit of unity. Maybe toy around with some more audio effects and editing tricks, like while the camera's inside the plane making the music sound like its coming from a speaker, or during the drop strobing the footage with the beat, or duplicating the camera shot so it's splitting the screen into four sections, all showing the same shot. Stuff that enhances what you add, and keeps the tone constant. Also, maybe try forming more narrative, cutting a bit of running around to focus more on the character. These are all just suggestions, but that's basically my two cents on the matter. Maybe like Luke said, try a widescreen shot for a more cinematic effect, or color filters to help make a scene pop a bit more.

Its just a bit... Boring. There's no real narrative to what happening, it just feels like a regular game of PUBG with special wooshie wooshie effects. If there was more sense of character, like i dun no, sections with you cowering in a toilet when you see someone, stuff like that.

Locemo

I think it could have clicked better if it was a short film. You could have widescreen and that sort of thing. The video's still great anyway btw.

I see no problem with the quality of the video or the content, but I think it doesn't work so well because it doesn't fit the style that you have kept to. The music, in particular, seems a little funny and it seems like its missing the personality some of the more recent videos have. I wouldn't say it's bad though, and I quite enjoyed it.

Jacob Banerjee

Personally the music doesn't fit with the brand either, nor with on screen, if it was Dan acting the character or the music was missing it may have worked? Or fit the rest of his content

ollie greenslade

Reminds me of the old Machinimas oh my god!

I really hope you mean rapping...

I liked it. I agree though that it felt like it was missing something. But I really like the concept.

I see what you mean, I felt like the story the video was trying to tell was almost there, maybe different music or like Linus said more wackiness or possibly just more shots of you being a badass would have really brought it together. That said the punchline (is that what you call it in a purely visual joke?) still got me, well done.

James

I have to say this was one of your best ideés in the recent past six months but i think it lacks the stuff that made you you, fucking insande hillarious weird things that happended. In this nothing really happened it was bassicly a normal PUBG playthough wich didn't really add anything with the lackluster animations and the total silence from the charachters. But i think it would have worked if there was a PUBG "Camera mode" which would let you give charachters animation and wepons and just dick around. If they would have had on of those everything would have been perfect acctually. Ps.- Not my type of music but it really worked acctually. Ps.Ps- It's very like what you did in the early years which i like. Ps.Ps.Ps.- It would be fun too have you and some other person play and see who lasts the longest (Especially tired Matt). Ps.Ps.Ps.Ps- You should try doing this type of thing or somthing completley different in Arma 3 because you can create som pretty interesting scenarios there. Ps.Ps.Ps.Ps.Ps- I just wasnted another Ps soooooo. Ps.Ps.Ps.Ps.Ps.Ps.- What does even Ps. stand for? -Why am i writing this as a letter? (Mister Kreosot)

love the idea but this is the opposite of my taste in music so it doesn't work for me

Kloovt

Very Refreshing, I like it! Nice seeing you getting your hands on machinimas again!

as someone who is tired with a nice pair of headphones this was very good although i understand why you wouldnt release it. Well shot and timed, pretty good choice in music but thats a personal taste matter. DO some more directing man this was great, a nice package to show off your filming technique

Stellar Star

The best part was the bit without any music. That's what didn't do it for me I think. Something a more special ops-ey feel with tense narration plus some humorous twist would be gorgeous

Samuel Hatton

I look forward to something from this. I liked the suspense quite a bit. Could you record one with a different weather like rain and give it some creepy music? I know that's a shite load of work but it might be fun.

FilthyJasmineTea

it needs dan bull raping insted of the music

Oh, hey! This is what I get for not clicking "Load more comments." You totally called it before I did.

Dave Miller

You know, that would work. Dan doing a DA-soundalike voiceover with subtle humor, maybe. It just feels empty without his voice.

Felice Enellen

Dan - The problem is that it lacks YOU. This could be anyone's video, aside from the intro branding. Your personality carries your brand. Your brand doesn't carry anything on its own. That's why it doesn't work as it is.

Felice Enellen

This video tipped me over the edge into signing on to patreon. I only have a little idea what video editing is like and the time and effort that goes into it but i'm in awe that something this polished and well assembled goes on the 'not good enough' pile. Chapeau Sir,

I honestly don't think it's possible to create something of decent broad with normal gameplay footage

Mirriky

Only watched the first few seconds before turning it off. I feel like the animations are so devoid of life that you would need a team of voice actors and every trick in and out of the book to give the illusion of them interacting.

Mirriky

I hate being so upfront some times but I actually enjoyed this PUBG video more then your recent VR Noire video. Sometimes it's nice to have a break between commentary videos and just show off your great directorial skills. :)

ranger10700

I loved it! much more tense then most action movies! I'm not a fan of that kind of music, but it was very fitting with the action movie feel the video had to me. But the silence is what was used best!

You should do another match but commentate it like it was the hunger games, giving each player a name and acting as if the audience had a connection with certain ones. With an enthusiastic commentator this could be quite entertaining. I'd imagine some sort of silly twist ending where we have a winner but they would be sniped by somebody we hadn't seen at all during the video and the commentator would give some witty comment on them.

I completely agree the pacing was all over the place on this. I could maybe see it working if there was an omnipotent narrator. Maybe even a Stanley parable style to it.

YourJelly

To say this is a rejected video, it really isn't half bad I can see the creative vision behind it and would have liked to have seen it go further, but you can't have a chicken dinner everyday.

Yorkshire Chef

It's an interesting one. On one hand, yeah it's nothing like most of your stuff; it's much less 'from your perspective' than anything else, voicework aside. It's a lot more of a narrative edited by you, and that's not bad just different. I think it's something solid at its core, though it doesn't mesh with your other content, and it could definitely have used more polish in the editing. The opening was strong as hell, and I loved the use of the music, there honestly could have been some more tight editing there. Hell, if you could even edit to skip-synch with the beats of the music, go for something more Baby Driver like, that could be a really cool project. As short as it was for a video, it almost felt too long; it dragged a bit, especially in the silent parts, which is odd as that's the most tense in a regular match. I feel that changes when you remove the live commentary, and edit it down - it's completely changes the tone from 'silent tension' to 'awesome action' even when there's nothing going on. Again to bring up the music and editing in the fore of the video, as well as Baby Driver, it reminded me something of the coffee scene in the later. No, nothing action-y is going on, but smooth editing and solid musical direction can turn it into a badass set of moments anyway. I feel this is less for capturing the game itself, and more for using the game as a building block in something altogether different. Regardless, looking forward to seeing what you do next with it!

BurningEmber

It really drags in the first half but it picks up and becomes engaging. Can see why you canned it, but isn't half bad

EthanASC

It's wonderful. It was a pleasure to watch and gave me chills at some points. However, I do agree that it is not what I would consider Saturday worthy. The feel and tone is grandiose but the scope of the plot is narrow. Everybody is suggesting nature documentary style commentary because that is one medium where a very small and narrow story is pursued. Either way, it was great.

I agree with you, Dan. It just didn't work.

ThisDamnScotsman

i​ like the idea, but ​i​ think it kinda lasted too long, and it could have done with a bit more of a variaty​ with the music.

Tvgold

Agreed, especially the wildlife docu idea. Would love to have an Attenborough-esque voice over on this.

Elenne Madrone

Very interesting idea. I hadn't realized just how versatile the replay system was. I kept thinking throughout it how it would work well with a voice over as if it were a nature documentary. Really it just needs something more than just music.

Needs more David Attenborough.

Dave Miller

maybe a change in music, and comedy style voice over to suit the actions. A little less film-esque, more shit-shit-shit, I'm going to die - shit-shit

This is a good start. The cinematography is done really well but I think what is missing is a cohesive story to tell. This felt pretty disjointed but I think this would really shine if you did a voice over of what the character is thinking through her head and also the other players.

Franklin Goodman

What you have here, Daniel, is a beautifully made video. I personally would've chosen different music, but that's me.

Anna Leigh Wilson

What the actual fuck dan, this is amazing

Jennifer J Waldorf

Do a voice over, and change the music, its not very you...

I think theres the start of something, but it feels too quiet mostly and too non-eventful. I think either it needs more drama or some comedy. Maybe a parody of a wildlife docu, or something along those lines. The music also doesn't work alone, it could work if it was a short snappy supercut but its length makes it feel like the audience is expecting something to happen in the immediate rather than waiting for the long haul. Anyhow thanks for sharing your creative process with us!

Vague attempt to sound smart and unique in a single line username

Liked the video and it was interesting but it was missing something 🤔🤔🤔 probably you talking over it

I enjoyed the video. But i understand why you say it didn't click. Something about it doesn't work, its a great video, just doesn't click as you say.

James Barber

The music gives it a Casey Neistat Vlog type feel. Really interesting concept.

Well, that IS why he didn't post it... it didn't quite have the N3 flair. :P

Tustin2121

I Liked it, It's not that we're used to but It's still a nice idea all together. I think personally what made this work less though are PUBG's clunky animations. That was the only thing that really took me out of it. Besides that, can't say that I found it bad. besides that, am glad and thankful to see some of the failed projects, Wouldn't mind seeing more 'failed' videos. :D

Rinaldo

Yes, that shield shot was awesome! The one where the camera moves into the door was cool too, as was that back and forth through the window shot near the beginning, ending with the off-screen death of one of the two people.

Tustin2121

The videography was good but it needs to be smoother. As the pans and tilts, the editing needs to sink up with the music. And I feel like the music doesn't fit the video. All the music felt very Casey Neistat when the music should of been more tense. The audio swapping in and out from diegetic to non-diegetic was good but could of been done better. Over all I enjoyed it. but it did feel a bit rough around the edges. [Unlike others I don't think it needs you. You are trying to tell a story with out dialogue] (My comment from youtube)

Your 3rd Testicle

I can see what you mean. It has lots of potential, but it doesn't quite click. In my opinion, it needs more story arcs, some rising and falling action that's there but isn't organized properly. Like with that guy on the roof, there's little payoff for the fight with him, and then we jump to the barrier closing in, and the guy dies during that? It's a little muddy, and if it was organized better into a couple of clean arcs, even if you have to rearrange the events somewhat, it might work better. The tension doesn't rise and fall so much as have a constant high, and that's not good for a story, even one that will abruptly end at some point. Also, if you can find a way to do depth of field or something, those two static wide shots might work better if there was something drawing our eye to the dot in the distance that we're supposed to be looking at. I think you'll find it hard to tell a good story from one PUBG match alone, and you'll need to alter the events of the match or smoosh together a few matches in order to make a coherent story.

Tustin2121

Don't even, it's so shitty

Stan Gaskell

Really good, but like everyone else seems to be saying, what it is missing is you, Dan. Would love to see this with either an incredibly serious and dramatic narration, or alternatively a very silly inner-monologue of this character as they fight, similar to the scared-secret-agent-in-the-plane from your Friends video maybe, just a thought

Conor Moran

I like it as a concept but yeah I agree it doesnt work. In my (limited) mind the two ways you could make this awesome involve commentary. You could go down the path of just playing a normal plays style video, but with cinematic camera instead, which would leave room for dramatic irony (say if you were hiding, and the camera revealed where the other player was, etc.) I think that would feel the most real or personal. You could also go down the kind of wacky, over the top storytelling you're so good at - think Infamous - Second Son - which would be highly entertaining. The problem with this is though it is really well put together, it lacks personality and individuality, which i think is one of your trademarks. That said, really interesting to see into the works, and by no means is this a bad video. Hope this helps!

Stan Gaskell

I like it! The camera shots were almost perfect (at some points the movement of the camera changed abruptly which is obviously a flaw in the replay tool that you did a good job of hiding). I think that the music choice, despite what others are saying, suits the tone of the game brilliantly. You should show this off if you are ever trying to get a job as a director, unless you manage to surpass it, as it very well shows off you skills in this area.

It's certainly got the beginnings of something awesome though! 7/10

This meant to be public?

Addison Reilly

Well this awful music certainly isn't helping....

Rowan Mackenzie

What it is lacking, in my opinion, are some voices. Maybe a dialogue between the protagonist and her HQ on the radio or her internal voice or just simply a narration. ..

Piotr Szczygielski

I really liked the music. Does anyone have info on that?

I adore this. Especially some of the more cinematic shots, the distance to not distance, or not distance to distance shots. It's so nice it looks staged and I love it.

Westley Wilson

This made me miss 13 ways to die actually, I really liked the video. Probably not good enough for the main channel but as a side thing, this was very fun.

Xelias

I really liked this and thought the camera work was amazing and you can obviously see that there's a potential for a story there so I just think you need to add that story layer to get the thing you want. It's a hunger games-esque game so treat it like that, instead of having you as the character, become the commentator like a sports game, but for murder. And maybe do it so you go through several people, aiming to get us routing for one and oops they're already dead... uhhh... next. You know? Love your work Dan

It definitely highlights just how shitty the animation/movement in the game is

The camera work was brilliant, however I don't think that the music doesn't give the right tone.. If the tone was more suspenseful which built up to the points where you shot, then cut out. It might have fit better... As for the character while certain moments of personality, it felt rather dry.. A voice over of a third party or maybe an internal dialogue could change it completely..

Chester

Very well done, especially loved the camera work and the music. The things I did not like were mostly due to the game, its bad and glitchy game graphics and also the choppy movement/animations. However I do very much like is the "17th" at the end.

I really like this overall, the only scene i wasnt keen on was the long shot where your crawling across the road. I get what you were going for I just am not sure that it executes well. I also kind of hoped you were going to end it with the drive of. My only other criticism. I think the music clue you in what is going to happen at the end a little to early. Id have prefered the effect of a hard stop on the music as the inevitble happens.

Simon Steel

great idea. really enjoyed this style you went for. make another for us Dannyboy.

Really liked the camera work and movements used.

mrvalane

I loved the shot of you running down the bridge from the barrier.

Tim Wiles

Great cinematography, great idea for a video but it just didn't seem like you. I think ignoring the fact there's no VO it still didn't have the N3 flair that makes your work... You! Despite that I really enjoyed it for what it was. Thanks for a look behind the curtain Dan.

Jordan Wood

(Oops, accidentally pressed enter too soon) 3) Do the voice over thing.

Jasmijn Wellner

I see three possible solutions here: 1) Get an order of magnitude more material to work with to craft something interesting. PUBG makes this hard, though, because there's probably not going to be any continuity in terms of locations and especially characters between matches. 2) Start with a certain narrative first, and get all of the players in that 1km range to play allong with it. Also impractical.

Jasmijn Wellner

Loved the camera angles

Was there no podcast because you were busy cleaning up all of the glitter from last night.

Edward Hagreen

Personally, I think the whole PUBG thing is already feeling stale and played out.

Baz Poulton

my friend records funny and embarrassing bits from his pubg matches for me, commentery make them funnier/more enjoyable.

I think the real problems were the music choice/transitions and just the general graphics of the game. Texture flickering, buggy animations, and choppy movement bundled with jarring music transitions and (in some opinions) not-very-good music took away from the immersion; however, the camera positioning and movement, length of the video, and visual transitions were done very well and I enjoyed it greatly because of those.

Nothing wrong with a nice condensed and concise Machinima.

Mike Jones

I think it's quite good. Admittedly the main issue is the lack of action for a lot of the film and trying to do something with that. I think it would have been better if you'd aded some more 'comedic' music to give the first sequence a lighter tone, which then would have contrasted well with the middle and the end where the action and the tension started to build up.

Mike Jones

I can see why you decided to not upload this, but I still really enjoyed some of the shots. I'll admit I didn't like the music cutting back in so suddenly after a lot of silence. Other than that and a couple other miniscule issues, I liked it.

Joe Dispoto

Your right there's something missing I'm unsure what but it's just didn't feel quite there for one of your videos, although the last few scenes where great when you see the shadow coming up behind the guy under the bridge then running to a car where great. Thanks for sharing.

Garry Haydon

I really liked it, some awesome cinematography (the shot where you followed the shield coming in was amazing). I do agree that there's something missing, I think it either needed to be shorter or of a more interesting match. But this format has potential

Aaron Place

I also think it is a good base to work with. I personally didn`'t knew if I was watching a comedy or something serious. Maybe because of that it sometimes feels a bit long.

i can see the idea you were going for here. the cinematography and music cues were perfect (it reminds me of a casey neistat movie) i think what was missing here was maybe a more exciting match? maybe cut out a bit of the 'boring bits'? (although that would make a short video much shorter)

CMS creations

I quite enjoyed this, it was like following the story of this character.

I mean, even if there were, Logan Paul's latest fuckup would probably have killed CPMs for a little bit too, soooo... can't lose what's not... already... there?

Judging by this video, you would be a brilliant director, please make a film!

Personally, I love it. It makes me think of one of the earlier episodes of Aeon Flux where there's no dialogue, just action and music, all leading up to the death of the main character. The shots are all amazingly lined up and I really enjoy how with some camera cuts you have to look at in and figure out what little motion you need to find, and then suddenly something else pops into frame. This may not be the most "entertaining" video, but it's still a fantastic one, I'm glad to be able to see it despite it being considered a reject.

Hang in there mate 👍

Jarrad M