Lehanan

I’m going nuts…

Added 2022-02-21 13:29:10 +0000 UTC

When I finished my chemo I was hyped, happy, just wanting to go back to my life and work.

However, I’m not ok. I’ve been diagnosed now with some mental disorders and conditions, and I can’t believe that now that I’ve defeated cancer I have to defeat depression.

Because yes. I have depression and I didn’t even realised it.

I’m trying to do my “homework” and strictly follow my therapy but I’m not liking what I’m seeing in myself. I wish fighting against cancer was only bearing surgery and chemo. Hah. Nope. It’s much, MUCH more…

I’ve never been so lost in my entire life. Well, I’ve never had cancer so I guess this is a “normal” process, even when other oncologic patients don’t openly talk about it.

I know I’ll also kick depression’s ass but, damn, I’m just tired of fighting. I’m tired of being strong.

I’ll keep posting art when I can but please, have in mind that I cannot be as productive as I was. I thought I could but that’s unrealistic.