About my background. Read with caution.
Added 2023-09-27 01:36:57 +0000 UTCHi, guys and gals. I thought I'd share a few things from my life with you to make it clearer where I get so many strange, controversial, or even provocative moments in my games. Let's start with a history lesson. Some of my subscribers can relate to it, but most of you probably not.
My childhood fell on that moment of Russian history, which can be compared to the Great Depression, but even worse, so there were even wars on our territory. I went to school in the 90s, at the height of poverty and crime. Many people were surviving as best they could and just couldn't keep an eye on the kids. Absolutely crazy times, when a lot of shit happened. And while it seems like my games are fiction, many of the stories are taken from real life. Let me explain.
So, how the school system worked back then. We had 11 grades. A pupil came to school at the age of 7-8 (1st grade) and finished school at the age of 16-17 because there was no 4th grade. So it was like 1-3 (elementary school), 5-9 (mid school), 10-11 (high school). And the most crazy years in my school were 8-9 grades, so it's like 13-14 y.o. kids.
There were 43 people in my class when the average class consisted of 25-28. When we were 13 years old, 3 of my classmates were pregnant, two were living with men in their 30s, plus a few were drug addicts. One of my girlfriend, a year older, who lived in the next building, got knocked up by her mom's lover almost at the same time as her mom, so they were both pregnant, and he dumped them, naturally. And these are far from the craziest stories, just light touches of what surrounded me.
That's why my characters treat teen pregnancies that special way like it doesn't matter. I grew up in a time when pregnancy was the last thing anyone worried about and often single mothers would put their daughters under adult men if they had money. Because there was no other way to survive. But back then I didn't realize it, to me it seemed like a natural way of life. We were really sure back then that if you didn't give birth at 15 from a rich guy, you are a fool and a loser.
It looks a lot like the College, doesn't it? Except without the dead bodies under the windows of the building where I lived. So it's probably my way to reflect the past. You know, like a psychological technique. Dunno, why did I write this text sheet. Just saw the old TV series about bad school and remembered those crazy times, yeah.
p.s. Don't mind this cringe. Stay safe, stay healthy, stay flexy and stay sexy. Yeah, something like this :)
Comments
Thank you for your thoughts! "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger." - I guess that's how we live. So yeah, I'm trying to digest my past in this weird way :)
Irena Alexandrova
2023-09-27 20:52:56 +0000 UTC"How close is Russia to that nowadays?" - Now we live better than 80% of Europe. And that's the problem of our kids. We saw a real shit but they lived calm and good life, and a lot of them don't even realize how bad everything was. Because of the size of the country a lot of things were very different in different regions. And some people were really fine. But some... well, weren't. Did you read "The Grapes of Wrath"? I don't know who could tell a story like that better than Steinbeck. His book resonates with me on so many levels. Eh, I shouldn't have watched that series. Now I'm just going on and on about my school days, thinking of moments that affected me much. I put a lot more of my past into the game than I intended. Because now, remembering some moments, I understand that they are reflected in the game, although I completely forgot about them. For example, physical violence: face slaps, slaps on the ass, fights. In the game, this is showed as a fetish and because of the love of bdsm, I did not think about why I have such an attraction to this. And now I think - wait a minute! - Marianna, the alpha bitch of my class. All the girls obeyed her, because she didn't hesitate to hit you in the face. And that's not exactly what you want as a girl. Yeah... It's something to think about.
Irena Alexandrova
2023-09-27 20:48:29 +0000 UTCWow, that's dark. I knew things were bad back then but this is a whole new level. I guess we're about the same age and back then, shortly after the fall of the Sovie Union, my school stablished a partnership and exchange programme with a Russian school in the coutryside not too far from Moscow. That exchange during the mid-90s was quite the culture shock for us, not just because of the vastly different standard of living and the crazy differences in the distribution of wealth (the exchange partner of one of my friends turned out to be the son of the regional mafia boss and they lived in a decadent manor surrounded by armed guards like tsarist nobility), but also because of the growing hopelessness as people began to realise that the economy was continuing to go downhill and that drunken buffoon at the head of the state was not likely to improve anything. There was scarcely anyone who still believed in a really posititve future. Yet people told us that they were the lucky ones, since the countryside provided them with the opportunity to grow most of their food themselves and even trade some of it in exchange for services like repair work. What really surprised us was that despite all those hardships people were so welcoming and put a lot of effort into making us feel at home in their homes. It was a strange experience that left us with quite a few crazy stories, but for us it was over after just two weeks. Most Russians could not just pack up and leave for a better life somewhere else. As a result some of us, myself included, felt a bit ashamed when our Russian counterparts came to visit us and saw that what were unobtainable luxuries for most of them was so normal for us and was treated so casually that we hadn't even thought about its value before. It certainly helped me to be more appreciative of what we have. I'm happy that you made it through all of that (hopefully) mostly intact and with a positive mindset. I'll keep my fingers crossed for your continued health, happiness and success. Thank you for sharing!
Mors Invictus
2023-09-27 15:56:39 +0000 UTCThank you for sharing your story with us! It's quite interesting! I'm actually surprised 90's Russia was such a horrible place to live. We in the west already had some idea, but it's far worse than most of us could imagine to be honest. How close is Russia to that nowadays? I'm sure it's far better now than it was in the post-soviet era, but it wasn't so long ago, most of the people is still living, still part of society.
thomasturi
2023-09-27 15:53:59 +0000 UTC
