Chapter 328

The Angel Express, Calais, France - 9:13 AM Central European Time

From the moment we got back on the train and over the next thirty hours of travel, Mercury and I barely got any sleep. The rest of the time had been spent in the training car with some advanced lessons. We leaned heavily into our enhanced Constitutions to keep going even when exhausted, but I made sure not to push him too hard.

Even though he was young, the ninja had a talent for combat. It was intuitive for him in a way that most people didn’t get, which was the main reason why I always went out of my way to recruit him. He melded well with Mental Link, too, and our rapport was high. These hardcore, personalized training sessions were doing him wonders, though we weren’t the only ones who were busy.

Ash had taken a break to make my feathered sawblades after she constructed the Hellbreaker’s shell, but she had been working on the bomb with an almost religious fervor from the moment she had gotten her hands on the Chernoshroom’s radioactive material. Aside from the times Bethany and I forced her to eat and take short naps during the long ride to France, she hadn’t left her forge.

Considering the time limit the Monstersmith was on, I didn’t blame her. But it was as she said, she could rest once she was done.

Bethany had made breakthroughs towards the enhanced Mental Points potion, but hadn’t succeeded in making one yet. I had given her all the hints I could without outright telling her how to make them, which would negate the big reward for reaching a new tier of craft. She was close, though, and I believed she would figure it out before I needed to drop the bomb.

I stood at the entrance to the Subspace Depot with the siblings as we waited for the Mills to return. They had assured us through Guild Chat that they weren’t too far away, and we were all excited to see them. Everyone who wasn’t busy, anyway.

The door opened to reveal a large Hell Hound charging at us. Bethany broke off, running for the dog, and he skidded to a stop before he could bowl her over. She threw her arms around Corwin’s neck and started petting him frantically. It took him a second to turn back into his original form, tail wagging, and start licking her face.

“Good to have you all back,” I greeted as Kayla and Jeff followed after.

“It’s good to be home,” she replied with a tired smile.

“No place like it,” he said with a grin, closing the door behind them.

I took a moment to look them over. They seemed to be in high spirits despite their fatigue. That was fantastic news since it meant that they had gotten a lot of what they had gone to England for, which was class gear. My focus went to Kayla first.

She was wearing a black suit and tie with a white undershirt. A coiled earpiece was dangling from her collar. Her glasses had been replaced by a new pair with stylish silver frames, though she still wore the same hat, shoes, and gloves. All in all, it looked like she had picked up three of her Double Agent items, which was a good haul.

Jeff, on the other hand, was kitted out in shining armor. From the boots on his feet to the barbute helm on his head, he was covered in metal. It had, however, been modified. That was the good thing about Knight class items; since there was a wide range of fighting styles, they were easy to change.

It appeared as though his set was lightweight and allowed him to stay maneuverable, perfect for a fencer. Even his helm seemed to be made to give him a wider field of vision than typical for its kind. It was lean enough that he could wear his Yellow Stinging Jacket over top of it, almost making him look like a mix between a greaser and a knight.

No, that’s exactly what he looked like. I tried not to laugh at the image that was conjured into my head of him riding around in an old car. A Mustang, of course.

“Kayla, hello. Good to see you,” Mercury greeted before turning to Jeff with a big grin on his face. He pulled the Princess from her sheathe and held her up. “Golden Retriever Knight! Behold!”

“Ooohhh!” Jeff breathed, approaching the ninja and his blade in awe. “She’s beautiful! She finally woke up? Is this her true form?”

“Yup, she turned into this masterpiece while we were deep in that Syrian volcano,” he bragged, puffing out his chest. “Yup, she—”

Mercury paused, looking at the space next to him. A clueless look passed over his face.

“Well, yeah, you were a masterpiece before this, too.” A pause. “No, I wasn’t implying that you weren’t one in your original form, I’m just saying right now you’re extra awesome. No, no, you’ve always been awesome, it’s just now you’re more so, that’s all.”

“This may last a while,” I said with an amused smile, and I gestured towards the train with my head. “Come on. We’ll get this thing moving and you can tell me all about your vacation.”

“Considering we were going almost completely nonstop since we got there in order to make the most of the trip, it wasn’t much of a vacation,” Kayla said with a dark chuckle.

“Oh!” Mercury started, ending his fight with his sword as he walked backwards beside me. “Jeff! I challenge you to a duel! The Warmonger and I have been spending hours in the training car, and I want to see where I stand against someone I might actually be able to beat.”

Jeff beat his chest with a fist before pointing at the ninja. “And you think you can defeat the mighty Golden Retriever Knight!? Mercury Moonslayer, I accept your challenge!” he roared dramatically before putting his hand on his wife’s shoulder and bringing his voice back down. “If it’s fine with you, Kay.”

“If you’ve got the energy, then go for it,” she said, patting his hand.

“Prepare yourself, then!” Jeff announced before heading towards the back of the train. Mercury broke off, following after him.

“I’m going to go change,” Kayla said with an amused shake of her head as she entered the dining car with me. “We’ll talk after that.”

“Sure thing,” I replied before making sure everyone was on the train. Bethany had Corwin walking beside her, but he broke off to greet me once we were inside and the door was shut. I started petting him with both hands. “Such a good boy. We all missed you, yes we did. Yes we did. The Angel Express isn’t the same without you.”

Corwin’s tail wagged even harder as he pushed his body against me, luxuriating in the attention, and Bethany joined in. He was one blissful dog.

But I knew Kayla wouldn’t be gone forever, and I sat down and ordered her some revitalizing tea from the dining car’s menu. Once that was done, I set our course and we were off in minutes. I was both excited to get back to the States and dreading it, considering what needed to be done, but there was no reason to put it off.

Bethany went back to work once she remembered that her time was limited and she still had work to do. With instructions to let Kayla know she’ll see her later, the Tea Witch ran back to her workshop, leaving me with a cup of hot chocolate and an Evolution Hound at my feet.

It didn’t take long for the Double Agent to join me at the table, and she took a sip of tea. Just enough time had passed to let it cool to the perfect temperature. She sighed appreciatively before leaning back and turning her gaze out of the window.

“Good to be home,” she repeated with a smile.

“Was it that bad in England?” I asked, stirring around the few marshmallows in my cup with a Constructed spoon.

“Not so much bad as tiring,” Kayla answered. “We knew our time was short so we didn’t get as much sleep as usual. Our Constitution scores and copious amounts of coffee kept us up for most of it.”

“Normally I’d chastise that kind of behavior since I’ve always made sure you guys had enough sleep, but  you did what needed to be done,” I said, making my spoon disappear as I leaned my elbows on the table. “You have a few pieces and Jeff seems to have collected almost his whole set.”

“Oh yes, it was a rousing success,” she confirmed with a smile. “And we did it all while avoiding any wizards, stone-bound weapons, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords, and the like. Didn’t pick up any Arthurian items whatsoever.”

I chuckled. “Happy to hear it. Good job. Must have been hard to keep Jeff away from all that kind of stuff.”

Kayla waved her hand. “It helped that he was preoccupied. Most of the knight orders wanted to recruit him on the spot after he received his first few Queen’s Knight pieces through the tournaments hosted throughout the cities. After he started looking like a proper knight, you know? I wasn’t expecting there to be so many, honestly, and they all wanted a piece of him.”

“Yeah, I was a little worried about that,” I said with a shrug. “But his heart’s here. I imagine he was going on and on about Sol Ligatus?”

“You definitely know my husband well,” she replied, nodding before taking a sip of tea. “He had a lot of fun, though. It was a good experience for him. He’ll probably start regaling Mercury with the tale of how he won against the man claiming to be King Arthur at some point while they’re fighting.”

“Jeff beat old Arthur?” I asked, arching an eyebrow. “Good on him. That’s no easy feat.”

“It was the highlight of his trip,” Kayla said as she leaned back in her chair. “My quests were a lot more troublesome. I wished it had been as easy as going to a few tournaments.”

I nodded. “Yours were probably way more time consuming than his, huh?”

“You got it.”

“What did you have to do?” I asked curiously. “I’m not really sure what you had to deal with as a Double Agent, honestly. Most of what I was able to put in my instructions for you were things I heard secondhand.”

“The info wasn’t a hundred percent accurate, but it did get me where I needed to go,” she replied. “It required a lot of subterfuge and information gathering to find bosses that would drop my gear, and that was a time consuming endeavor. Like I said, Jeff had it easy.”

“You picked a hard class. It’s a testament to your skills that you were able to get three pieces in such a short time. You’re my number two for a reason, Kayla,” I praised, and she gave me a tired smile. “Was it at least right enough that you knew you’d be fighting a bunch of Bond villain wannabes?”

“And one Dr. Evil,” she answered with a roll of her eyes. 

“Really? There was a parody villain in there?” I  asked with a chuckle.

“There was!” Kayla answered. “He actually managed to capture Jeff and tie him to an operating table with an honest to god death beam pointed at him and everything. The guy then left him with an easy to kill minion, which I did, and we had to get him before he escaped in a plane. His whole base exploded before we could go back and dismantle the weapon to bring back.”

“Damn, that sounds rough.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” she complained with a frustrated groan. “He didn’t even drop a Double Agent piece for me. All that effort, and it was regular loot. Which meant we wasted almost half a day on a wild goose chase.”

“They’re not guaranteed drops, unfortunately,” I said, though I did cringe. Not getting what you were looking for sucked.

“You were clear on that, but it was still disappointing,” she replied with a shrug. “But it is what it is. Both of us are stronger now than we were before, and that’s what matters. That, and we’re coming back with a little something for Ash.”

“Oh?”

Nodding, Kayla swiped open her inventory and pulled out two golden scales. Each one was a rounded triangle with one edge the length of her arm. She seemed to struggle slightly with them before setting them on the table next to us, which creaked under their weight.

“Two scales from a Dragon that hunted us down because it caught Jamie’s scent on us,” she explained, patting the lustrous items fondly.

“Good get,” I praised with a grin. “Based on the size, that was probably Valthraxyvr, right?”

“Yes, according to his introduction after he was done interrogating us,” Kayla confirmed.

“He’s one of the top Dragons in the Gold Scale Consortium,” I explained with a whistle. “That must have been a true test of your Moxie and Credibility scores.”

“Luckily, they are quite high now,” she replied. “We— Well, I managed to convince him that we had killed Jamie. You were absolutely spot on about getting some blood from her. The Drakefang Dagger soaked it right up, and it was enough to change his tune. Still lamented the passing of an egg, but he was grateful.”

“And how do you feel about that?” I asked sympathetically. This wasn’t some random monster that she was getting to know and backstab, but a true force for good.

Kayla shrugged. “I did what I had to do. The fact that I didn’t like lying to him is irrelevant after that,” she answered, and I could tell it still bothered her. “Jeff was torn up about it, but Valth seemed to take it as him simply being sad that there’s one less Dragon in the world.”

“Yeah, he’s always got his heart on his sleeve. Still, I’m glad it all worked out for you two. I can admit I was a little worried.”

“Oh, sure, worry for us when you’re the one with a giant target on your back,” the Double Agent chuckled as she took another sip of tea. “What about you four? Any big news to share other than the Princess waking up? It seems like you fixed yourself up, given that you’re actually looking at things now.”

“That’s the second and third biggest story, respectively,” I answered with a smile. “Once we pick up Jamie, we’re heading straight for Washington D.C. Let me regale you with the adventures of the Warmonger and Mercury Moonslayer, adventurers extraordinaire.”

“This ought to be good,” she replied with a good-natured roll of her eyes, and I launched into my tale with enthusiasm.