Here we go!

TLDR; 

they wanted the story to be more kid-friendly, reduce Charles to a background character and make him "nicer", and push Sam to the front and make him the main character with the story focusing on his crush on Spike and have Spike's trauma be a "mysterious trait" rather than an actual issue.

I disagreed, so I resigned.

They scoffed at my mention of the series' online readership, which pissed me off, and if anything only make me feel more sure that a webcomic suits the series better. This is where it started and this is where it should be.

A hardcover book would be awesome and can still happen, either through kickstarter and self publishing or pitching it to an English speaking publisher I deem fitting. But due to the comic's unapologetically realistic nature in terms of mental health, it is very unappealing to a lot of publishers, so I feel the internet is a better platform for it anyways. It can also reach out to a wider audience that way, meaning a higher chance of being found by people who might find comfort and healing in it, which is ultimately the main goal; making people feel seen and like they're not fighting these battles alone. That there is hope, and there is help to be found.

Speaking of mental health, I have at long last realized the crucial need to prioritize mine in my own personal life, meaning I cannot do this comic on a tight schedule. I'll rather upload pages in my "traditional" manner, where I post as soon as I have any, and either one at a time or a whole sequence or even chapter at a time, could be anything from several pages a month to a big update once and then two or three months until the next one. I know I could make like a big stack of pages and schedule them, but for the sake of reading flow I'd rather make and post them as I see fit and in an order or bulk that makes sense.

I'll also have a second webcomic on the side, which I know sounds insane but here's the thing:

Art is my safe space, my little haven of silence, a hobby I keep to relax and drift off. Making comics is my means of escaping the world when it gets too heavy to deal with.

Given the heavy and realistically themed SPiKE's nature, it isn't the most relaxing project to work on, in fact it affects me greatly as an empath and I always feel the need to take a long break and find some other therapeutic means of escapism after working on it.

I know from experience that when working on an art project feels draining, there's nothing more relaxing than drawing something entirely different instead.

People on discord will have noticed already my current hyperfixation with a certain Belgian comic and my side project in making fan comics of it, so while it may seem like a distraction, it is actually a massive creative boost that helps me a lot in being able to work on SPiKE.

So having two webcomics that I can work on in my own time, seems to me like a perfect combo that I can maintain for a long, long time, because this is basically what I'd be doing anyways and have been since I was a kid; working on several different comics at a time, and I've finally found back to that excitement of drawing again.

Like just moments before writing this post, I audibly gasped in excitement at the sight of my sketchbook because I had gotten a sudden,  inescapable urge to draw and my sketchbook was within arms reach already.

I've missed that so freaking much.

And I gotta thank my Belgian muse for that as I've found the most relatable creator ever, a true kindred spirit and I find so much healing and comfort in his biographies and I keep falling in love with his creations and his love for them. He's rekindled my passion for sketching and making stories, and given me the confidence to stand firmly on my own artistic visions and integrity.

 It's  gonna take a while to prepare the upcoming pages though, having to scrap a lot of the current, publisher-edited ones and working on my unedited layouts and sketched for how I intended the story, and rearrange it all to my own liking.

But I have the prologue pretty much ready.
The original prologue, which was much too dark for the publisher, but which I feel stays the most true to the soul of the story and while isn't a comfortable read at all at least gives off the effect and tone I need it to have to stay respectful to the characters and realistic undertones of the project, as well as give new readers a solid heads-up of where this story goes sometimes, instead of sneaking it in as an uncomfortable surprise later or some downplayed gimmick...

The webcomic format also gives me plenty of space to post little spin offs or strips of a more light hearted tone to break the  tension now and then and just let the characters be nerdy little goofs and have some fun as well.

I think this is all gonna feel very deviantart-days ish, but with more structure and actual comic pages being posted at long last. 

Any scrapped pages will be posted on patreon as bonus content stuff :)

I gotta figure out how and where to post the actual pages though.. I want them to be free to read on a separate website, but with early access / first reads,  bonus content and all the other goodies available to pleding patrons only -  and I have a lot of ideas and goodies planned for you guys <3

Thank you for your love and support and patience for all this time, it means more to me than I know how to properly express...! <3 You're all my reason for continuing on this project, and I am so excited to finally show you guys the fruit of my tedious labor <3 *group hug*

Here's to the future! <3  *raises glass*