Poll #2. Vote on the contents of Carl's Fan Box

Darn. Joined too late to vote.

Deana Whitney

A cookbook that gives extra stats if you cook royalty.

Alon Rozental

the anarchists cookbook was voted for on here, which came from his creative process. just like these suggestions have come from his creative process, fans aren't coming up with plot are they, its a shame you didn't process yourself before making this unhelpful comment.

Adam

Chad Greene

Shouldn't be any of the choices if you ask me.

Chad Greene

Perhaps another yam

Nicole LaBossiere

Oooh, that's the stuff.

MJW

Awe dangit. You know that fruit basket would have held all kinds of hidden luscious secrets!!

Janette

Except the toolbox was empty. He could tell

Janette

Mawage

Janette

I don't get you people at all. Snake Patch for life!

FossilWreckers

Yes, like: I would have been so interested how a fruit basket or a poem would effect the endgame

son of gaming

Also every one voting for the book. Go and change your response it is like the most boring choice there. Only the Warrant is actually worse - I want him to get it but in a prize box is just wrong. I do want it to be something of a prize.

Bru-

Filter for polls it has also been repeated in the mess that is this thread maybe twice. But Filter polls and it is there. Also everything on the carousel.

Bru-

Wait the patreon voted on the cookbook? What on earth were the other options?

philip smith

I, hereby give the royal decree that for now on we do not vote for the War Mage book. We are almost certainly going to get the lore and exposition about the war mages no matter what, so picking the book would ultimately be pointless. Instead we should vote for some of the other options that have suspiciously short descriptions , say the patch or that fruit basket. Or really anything else just please stop it with the book. Sincerely, Draconis Von Shishedkabob

Dragan

Can we get the poem here on Patreon even if it never shows up in-universe? 😄

James Harris

Mongo is appalled!

alex

The reason I picked Princess Chanda was because as as child my mom had a great friend whose hippie parents named her Crystal Chanda Lear. She passed away when I was in high school.

Melissa Glisan

Marriage or a book? Its simple.

BlaueFeder

No. Oh gawd noooo

Melissa Meitle

Probably full of "yams"

Melissa Meitle

I really like this idea actually

CaptainFlowers

This is low key giving me anxiety

Will B

Now Matt has confirmed that the marriage doesn’t add Carl to the line of succession I have a new burning question about that option. Would this change the name of the party to “the royal court of Prince Consort Carl”?

HT

Oh man, it’s too late here in Aus to be sober enough to give this justice. This is the first time I’m not going to immediately go for it. Thanks again Matt, my Saturday morning is going to be amazing (I hope).

William Magee

I feel oddly nervous on voting on this. What if the option I choose forces a circumstance where one of my favorite fictional characters die. I don’t want that on my conscience.

schnasty

I hate to repeat a plot point especially one that grants all kinds of plot armor. I'm against the book. Let's do something else

KarlS3

Ooh thanks for pointing that out. Although now I’m slightly disappointed to not see how Matt gets Carl out of that predicament.

HT

Matt Dinniman 18h For the record, I did think about this, but I want to be clear this will NOT happen if this is chosen. If that had happened, Rishi would've had to have been in the line of succession, too, and I want to avoid this particular conundrum. For now.

Luke Stephenson

The first half, I’d argue that it included all royal members of the blood sultanate present in the dungeon and if Carl was suddenly and unequivocally married into it, he would count. But the achievements and no take backsies is a solid point that I’m inclined to agree with. The only caveat is that the AI can be a real dick who’s original purpose is to make an entertaining show and that sounds like it would fit right in

Dirty Dibbler

Yes!

Stanislem

Hey if putting on a tiara can add you to the line of succession why cant a marriage certificate? Especially if the AI is being an asshole.

HT

I doubt it, since the blood sultanate is the indungeon version of the royal family. this more likely puts him in line for the ACTUAL throne of the nagas.

Felix Müller

I didn't even consider that when I voted for it, that would be fucking Savage

DarnChaCha

Ohhh fuck does the marriage option put Carl in the line of succession for the blood sultanate?

HT

Dick toes to make the ai happy

Scott Hess

I voted Fruit Basket because it has to be so much more.

Dan

I think the Blood Sultanate = all the royal Nagas that were in the dungeon, on the 9th floor. That doesn't include the Nagas that stayed back home, on the Naga homeworld. Otherwise, the whole Sepsis Whore Crown wouldn't make sense, since crawlers can't possibly slaughter the Nagas that are in another solar system. :) Also, IIRC, after Carl (and his slug haha) killed the Nagas in Club Vanquisher, they all got the achievement for finishing the Blood Sultanate quest. No take-backsies. :P

Grigorius of Tomsk, Devourer of Pop-Tarts, Victor of Many Battles

That was my thought as well

Heather Terwilliger

I voted War Mage, but I feel like the fruit bowl would have given off that "this is important" shine because of how out of place it feels...

Tad Abukuppeh

Have you read buymort? Spoiler alert, people/snake sex is weird

Bill Gullotti

Matt I hope you were talking about the endgame of the floor and not of the series. We need Carl and company to make it to the 18 floor. Marriage seems out of place in the series: vote war mage

Brian Reese

3% at the time of this writing. :( Seriously a naga poem is fantastic. It could also double as a bard spell that Doughnut refuses to read because it is about her even though it is critical to winning a fight.

Thomas

Please make it a pop-up book of history warmages. With little tabs showing blasting when slid on the pages.

Derek Reilly

About as likely as Game of Thrones ending with Jon and Daenerys getting married, and Theon being the best man after his dick magically grew back.

Ilya Taytslin

Matt already said he is not putting Carl into Blood Sultanate line of succession

Ilya Taytslin

I can think of more ominous joinings, but not many

Ilya Taytslin

Yes to all of this haha

Shannon

The potato root vegetable thing has been entertaining ever since it came out, so I'm opting for the fruit basket. All of these are good choices, though.

Ed

No step on snek

Michael Alpert-Appell

Oooo I like this

Jay Prado

A spell called dick fingers… turns carls fingers into dicks for x amount of time which adds the debuff dick slapped to targets hit when using bare “knuckle” skill. Also applies the skill post nut clarity that completely negates him passing out if he lets his scavenger daughter fester to too long before using the daughters kiss

QueenofHartbrake

i honestly would be happy with any/all of these, but my lizard brain can’t get over the phrasing of “a cool patch that does something cool.”

Claire

Fruit basket. 0 explination. Just a huge fruit basket of regular old boring fruits. Leaves Carl and the team scratching there head even more.

Brian

please tread on me

Claire

Serious question. Is Princess Chandra in the line of succession for the Blood Sultanate? I don’t know if I could deal with the emotional turmoil of Carl, Donut, and Katia all struggling with that game mechanic.

Dirty Dibbler

Team LOOT, y'all would love the Cradle series if you haven't read it. Takes a bit to get to the loot part, but I love that Lindon and Carl love taking EVERYTHING they can haha.

Jas

I thought the poem about donut would get more votes. Can we get the poem as a patreon exclusive? Or one of the audio extras at the end.

fightnerd

Yes! They've been hinting at that war mage head being a big deal repeatedly

Lorimar

Marriage to a galactic power has major implications external to the crawl. Warmage book has major implications internal to the crawl. Both of those at once... Holy crap , talk about direction changing. Carl would go from "starting to hurt some amount of folks associated with the crawl" to legitimate "I will burn you all down, I will break you" on a galactic scale. Paired with the Earth AI zone of influence rapidly expanding... The last books in this series might not even be on earth.

Nyquistfrequency

Guys the last book Carl received gave him such an advantage. And war mages are a THING now. GIVE the MAN the BOOK

Kate Allen

Clearly all of the enemies need to be decapitated, even if only to quell Stephen Greenwood’s incessant need to get a Ghost Ship trap.

Dragan

Marriage Certificate or Mew Patch. For sure

Jim Robinson

Yeah right, this is “Dungeon Crawler Carl” we’re talking about, it never have a wholly good ending.

Dragan

I know right, we get to have super important inputs on this epic story.

Dragan

It will be interesting to find out if Chanda is actually naga.

A

Marriage would be funny, but the War Mage book sounds more interesting for the plot.

MJW

"A cool patch . . . Probably a snake." Don't Tread on Me flag image - changed into a Rishi caricature stomped by a foot titled "Tread on me"

Treamayne

The marriage certificate would be so funny. I’m a little over halfway done the 6th book so idk if I’m missing anything but I’d love to see how it affects the AI and his relationship with Katia (I’m a sucker for a happy ending if she’s not already dead or a doomed NPC please don’t spoil). Also I want Donut’s reaction to the princess bit and I want Mongo in a top hat as I’ve seen another comment suggest (or any of Donut’s many, many hats really)

Britt

Picture it, a woman, dejected and alone. She's had to leave earth and explore the galaxy but everywhere she goes, she's already famous. An anti-crawl faction take pity on her and shelter her, giving her a new name that means "Reborn" in pre-syndicate-standard Naganese. A civil war occurs and she is elevated to the position of princess as a figurehead of the faction.

Sandboy OC

I’m not following the meaning for this comment. But thank you?

Jacob Biery

I went with book and fruit basket. I agree that the fruit basket should be incredible fruit that heals, cast spells, improves ink, maybe mind read abilities to get more secrets revieled ...And I also think that the War Mage characters could be incredibly developed through a book. I am definitely getting the vibe that the universe is trapped in a vicious thousands of years cycle, and many are trying to get out. The computer generated life/war mages could be come Independent wise mages, helping the NPCs get out.

Paulamarie Young

I always assumed that a shaped doomsday scenario was going to be involved near the end of the final book.

Sandboy OC

The two front runners sound awesome but maybe some additional side eye and votes should be given to the items with suspiciously short descriptions 🤣.

Elissa Kirk

Wait....the Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook was originally a POLL ANSWER??? Very cool y'all. That's one of my favorite plot devices of all time!

Runae Lee

Thanks for going to the effort of finding and writing this out, much appreciated.

Sandboy OC

Hello Princess Jacob!

Mentive

Fruit and book is where I'm leaning

Paulamarie Young

Only way out would be to send him through the Gate at the end, and have him come back as Feral Carl in book 8.

Mentive

Thanks.

Paulamarie Young

I really want to know about the fruit basket

Michael Mondle

team LOOT over here, love the possibilities of the patch/nipple ring combos for Carl and Donut

Shannon Gunn

For everyone voting on the nipple ring- that’s exactly how one gets a visit from the ASPCA.

Joseph Harris

Madman or genius. It's hard to tell

Paulamarie Young

Oh boy. Send him through the gate of the feral gods at the end of book 7, and then he will be Feral Carl when he's rescued in Book 8.

Mentive

Mongo in a top hat walking down the aisle with a ring on a pillow.

Steven Kendrick

MONGO will be appalled because he wanted to be the ring bearer

Cary Serack

The fruit basket would be full of toraline level shit wouldn't it? I think the marriage certificate is too good of an idea not to go with. Although it would be way funnier if it was Donut getting married to Naga royalty instead of Carl, even though it's Carl's reward

Mike

Had the same thought when I saw them too!

Peter Saucier

I’m totally here for the AI’s announcement somehow tying Carl getting married to Donut getting a new nipple ring. 🤣

Jenifer Martinez

If the marriage certificate wins the insulting poem could be included as a wedding gift.

David W

Wait, you crazy fucks voted on the anarchist cookbook? That wasn't planned from the beginning? Wtf!?!! I can't picture this series without it. You are a fucking madman Dinniman.

fightnerd

As hilarious as it would be for Donut to get a nipple ring (maybe even a complete set of 6 holding a tummy protector on), I think that could come later... That and Donut deserves celestial nipple rings, not "common" legendary rings!

Mike Rylander

Oh yes please!

Mike Rylander

I'm surprised that there wasn't an option for Princess Vinata/Rishi skin boots. Not only would it show how much Naga society didn't like their leadership, it'd also be an FU to Carl, since he can't wear shoes! lol!

Douglas Erdman

wedding cock ring, christ that would be funny 😂

waterkangaroo

Of course I remember. It's all I think about.

Nicholas Sheets

Also, I remember that Shi Maria was very interested in the severed War Mage head Carl had in his inventory, so there's clearly an interesting story there.

Michael Alpert-Appell

This could make a lot of the legal troubles Carl has outside the crawl just that much more interesting. Remember when the AI gave him single shares of stock in all the syndicate companies & it gave him legal standing in syndicate courts?

Douglas Erdman

I am straight up flabbergasted to learn that the Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook was a fan voted item. I can't even imagine how different the story would have turned out otherwise. Carl's emotional reaction to meeting the other anarchists have been some of my favorite moments in the entire series.

Michael Alpert-Appell

We don’t know if this woman is part of the blood Sultinate.

Bill Gullotti

The war mage book is a great idea, but it feels like plot armor to slap him with exactly what he needs when he needs it. Carl isn’t Jason. It should come from someone like the pulpmancer, who was able to cast himself into another body after the flood took him. He would know… yeah, because science.

Bill Gullotti

> A pair of +2 “Choose any skill you want” skill potions. Holy shit. Mordecai would have absolutely creamed his pants over these.

Michael Alpert-Appell

I'm just learning that the Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook prize was voted on! Does that mean the entire former authors of the cookbook wouldn't have existed without it? That had a wild impact on the story

Mark B

You monster.

Michael Alpert-Appell

It would be amusing to have the fruit basket and the arrest warrant together.

Eleanor Skinner

Plot twist: Princess Chanda turns out to be a lovely, kind person and the series ends with her and Carl living happily ever after together.

Michael T

Seriously. How does that not have more votes?

A

My vote exactly.

Greg Zoeller

The marriage certificate and the arrest warrant showing up together would give Carl a great deal of insight into what is going on!

Maxwell Beckett

wait, if carl is married to a Naga... does that put him in the line for succession?

E13design

Although I know it won't win... I love the nipple ring prize. Doubly so since it would end up with Donut wearing it.

The Lost Pages

Dude only has so much “bathroom reading time!” 🤣

Janette

Lightning Rod cod be great for putting Donut in danger. :D

Buzz Larch

A pair of +2 “Choose any skill you want” skill potions. - 45 A 500 pack of sticky bombs - 16 More earth books. A lot more books. Like a full bookstore’s worth - 20 His dad’s Motorcycle (with sidecar) - 44 A recipe book. “The Best-Laid Traps in Dungeon History.” - 46 A single book. “The (Dungeon) Anarchist’s Cookbook.” - 92 Magical Chaps - 51 His rolling work toolbox and everything inside including his power tools + the ability to charge them. - 32 A +10 to a random stat potion (that will boost his intelligence.) - 22 A pop-up reward room where he’s given all of the above choices, and he has to pick one himself. - 101 ... so fans picked the carousel, then Carl picked the cookbook.

J Holmes

stinko that marriage certificate is winning, I do think the "marriage ring" is a bit more fitting to the universe and special items as a whole - but tbh, I have no clue what's happening in the story right now. I have a lot of catching up to do. To the 50 of you who voted fruit basket, Your champs, and a bunch of fruits yourselves - in a good way.

Frosty40

Now I’m walking around chanting “MARRIAGE”

Chey Collar

Marry a war Mage ❤️

Addie

June 2020, apparently. Looking it up now. Fans chose the carousel and the anarchist cookbook. The choices were what Carl had in the carousel. The options/votes were as follows: A pair of +2 “Choose any skill you want” skill potions. - 45 A 500 pack of sticky bombs - 16 More earth books. A lot more books. Like a full bookstore’s worth - 20 His dad’s Motorcycle (with sidecar) - 44 A recipe book. “The Best-Laid Traps in Dungeon History.” - 46 A single book. “The (Dungeon) Anarchist’s Cookbook.” - 92 Magical Chaps - 51 His rolling work toolbox and everything inside including his power tools + the ability to charge them. - 32 A +10 to a random stat potion (that will boost his intelligence.) - 22 A pop-up reward room where he’s given all of the above choices, and he has to pick one himself. - 101

J Holmes

Lightning rod 🤣

Grace, The Bringer of Scalpels, Queen of Fuckeryy

We made the Cookbook? Holy actual fuck. I can see how you'd write around it but the insight it gave Carl was so much better than the usual "main character just always gets lucky" route.

Addie

The war mage book sounds perfect... more books for the man who loves to read

Failtasmagoria

Makes sense. Marriage doesn't count until you consumate it.

Nicholas Sheets

I wasn't reading Matt's Patreon until recently, so I too had no idea the cookbook was reader-chosen. When did that happen? I'd love to know what all the options were!

Laura Hemly

I really think a few other things could come through with the Marriage Certificate. Like a note with the poem from the bride and maybe a gift from her.

Bru-

Or both the marriage certificate and the arrest warrant 😁

Skye Benz

Is it possible that we could get /both/ the marriage certificate and the book, which are in position 1 and 2 right now? I'd love to see how both affect the story.

Skye Benz

For the record, I did think about this, but I want to be clear this will NOT happen if this is chosen. If that had happened, Rishi would've had to have been in the line of succession, too, and I want to avoid this particular conundrum. For now.

Matt D

Who’s to say that wedding ring won’t be penile?

Melissa Glisan

The Prince Albert of excessive girth.

Robert Griswold

Dude you're absolutely obsessed with Ghost Ship traps. How many people have you beheaded? Be honest.

Andrew Bartlett

It's from June 29, 2020 but you can also filter his posts in the app to view all the past polls.

Nicholas Sheets

the real question: is the AI a possessive bitch who would get pissed about a naga moving in on its man 🤔

waterkangaroo

I joined Patreon after Book 3 was already published, and had no idea until now that the Cookbook was a fan-vote item. Can someone link or screenshot the original poll?

Ilya Taytslin

Great options! My initial thought was "Do the contents affect the plot line", versus something that is funny but doesn't affect or advance a storyline.

Ryan Smith

A second cook book for Carl or a massive info lore dump on the rest of the universe sounds amazing

Zauz

I like description of patch to do somthing cool like snake 🐍

Baurzhan Dosym

LOL. I love being able to vote on fan boxes. PS-I hope DCC becomes a video game. It has such potential.

Chris Peary

Two in a day? Horny.

Joseph Slaughter

I’d like to see him get a wedding ring that is too good not to wear.

DannyK

Oh shit how do I take my vote back 😱

Kamui

no dick piercing? very sad 😔

waterkangaroo

Does the fruit basket come chowder style?

Joshua Ingersoll

Princess Chandra is it? I think not! Carl only has room for ONE Princess in his life thank you very much!

AmberTheIrishPersian

A patch that depicts a ship with a skeleton head, kinda like the cover/poster of the movie "Ghost Ship" would be awesome. Especially if it gave him a skill to set wire style traps that cut people's heads off like in the movie, or you know, like "The Hobgoblin Riot." Also, be even cooler if the decapitated enemies became possessed and Carl was able to control them for a short time kinda like Donut's 2nd chance skill..

Stephen Greenwood

I do like the idea that a fruit basket could have far reaching implications for the series

Nicholas Sheets

Fruit basket gang !

Aaron Jenkins

Chandra sounds HOTT!

Shakespeare

I learned about the cookbook being an IRL fan item today. Previously (and today included) I have viewed the cookbook as one of the best artifact/items I’ve ever read about or seen otherwise. The fans choose correctly.

Ranen

Matt, what would have happened if we hadn't voted in the Cookbook? Also, do you still have the details on what the other items were? I'd love to know.

David K. Storrs

Fuck. What did I just vote for?

Christoph Hall

It’s how we got the cookbook.

Robert Griswold

Completely unrelated. Please have Carl use shaped charges at some point, thank you.

Andrej Cepak

Looks like I found a couple of sneaky Naga.

Serial Kilroy

Weve got to get the book and marriage cert tied!

Chris Britt

The actual head of the naga reporter suing Carl because he stabbed him at the dungeon con. With a pen sticking out of the neck. A secret message or something else special is in the pen.

Robert Griswold

The sibilant tones!

Stanislem

C'mon! Why is the poem insulting Donut so low! Don't we all wanna see/hear her reaction and the poetry skills of Naga

Stanislem

WE GETTIN CARL A GIRL YOOO

Charlie Marriott

Some really interesting options and so I picked the patch and also the book to keep it consistent with how Carl has evolved. Hoping the patch has really cool features, but also some unexpected consequences. Also kinda like to know how the marriage-in-absentia story line would unfold, since Donut would have a field day knowing Carl was married to a snake haha

Alan Meyer

Voting on the contents of a fan box is a bit on the nose, isn't it

Jackie Etienne

Matt said multiple choices are allowed.

Christopher McCoy

Want to see our boy get hitched lol

Diana Stewart

In the paragraph before the vote it says multiple choices allowed.

Vaughn Mortensen

C'mon, marriage certificate *and* arrest warrant! The possibilities of those two together...

Randall Wald

Multiple choices allowed. That makes it more entertaining. For me, at least. Heck, if you hate a certain choice so much, you can vote everything except that one.

Matt D

That marriage certificate sounds like a good way to put Carl in the line of succession. Nice try you evil man you

Nicholas Sheets

That's exactly what a hidden Naga would say

Aaron Krick

Two votes in two days! I'm not sure I like being able to potentially have such a strong impact on the series.

ListenTo100PercentEat

Yay democracy! Give it to us hard Matt.

orion

Please let the poem be a Haiku.

Michael Le

Mist Sparrow

The marriage certificate because Donut is gonna be so pissed she missed out on planning the wedding hahaha

Keith Ross

You’re a man of your word Matt!

Max

Dang it! I’m not a Naga.

Jacob Biery