Post 184: Groceries at His Door

What’s that…? I began, being torn from sleep by a rapping at my door, Who’s that..? It’s…

I looked at my phone.

It’s after nine!! I’m late for patients!

In an instant I jumped from bed, my head immediately swimming - how did I get here, wasn’t I on the couch?? - and realized I’m naked. Shanette, I remembered, Oh my god…

The knock again, at my door.

“w-who is IT??” I called out, looking for anything, a towel, a pair of shorts, to hide my nudity.

“It’s Josie!!” called the voice again, through the door.

“Just a MIN-ute!!” I blurted back, hearing the crack in my voice again. Trying to clear my throat, I pulled off the thin, crumpled comforter from my meager bed and wrapped it awkwardly about myself.

What is Josie doing here?? I thought, nearly tripping over the ends of the comforter as I hurriedly stepped towards the door and undid the handle. Come to get me out of bed because I’m la- ?

I opened the door to see Josie, standing and smiling, holding several bags of groceries in each hand. She was in tiny black gym shorts and a matching black tank, arms and shoulders exposed, and looked fitter than I would have guessed.

“Can I come in?” she asked, the glimmer in her eyes seeming higher than I’d expect. She is wearing gym shoes, and I’m barefoot, but still…

She bit her lower lip and watched me shake my head in confusion. Groceries??

“You said you needed them…” she said, finally stepping past me as I drifted back, a waft of perfume, shampoo and gym in her wake. She set straight for my small dining table with aplomb, and placed the heavy bags upon it.

I blinked, watching her. Yes, I had mentioned to Melissa, yesterday, that I needed to get out grocery shopping. I had been planning on doing it this morning, in fact, before work. But I didn’t intend for-

“…so here you go!” Josie beamed, beginning to unpack the bags onto the table, “Did I do good? I got you fruits, veggies, that yogurt you like…”

“I, uh, yeah,” I answered, rubbing my head with continued confusion, holding my blanket around me as well I could. I should have gotten dressed, made her wait a minute. This is totally inappropriate. “But this wasn’t necessary. How much do I owe y-“

“Oh, no worries,” she waved me off, “Missy gave me the card, it’s our treat.” Apples, one, two, three. “And she told me to tell you to get used to it,” she continued, smiling proudly as she unpacked a box of some kids’ cereal, “we’re taking care of groceries for you from now on.”

What the hell is happening?? Why did Melissa think I needed someone to do my shopping for me?? I was perfectly capable, right? Of getting my own groceries? Was this some game, some joke? Some attempt by the hive of women to, I dunno, infantalize the lone male in the ranks?

“Why,” I began, catching myself staring at Josie’s plainly gym-toned ass  as she unpacked a bag onto my small countertop, “did you all think I n-NEED-ed…” I trailed off, when my voice cracked again.

“Well,” Josie said, blowing a strand of hair off her face and putting down a rotisserie chicken to turn and look at me, “with your car being gone and all, we just thought-“

My what??

Immediately I ran to my little window, which looked over the building’s parking lot. The space that usually had my car, where I’d left it…uh…I don’t remember the last time I drove….

“WHERE’S MY CAR?!?”

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