In this one Bart attempts to make a baby because that's the kind of plot The Simpsons was doing around season 21. He spends the episode trying to get Homer and Marge to fuck because he wants a brother, and also so he can watch and say ay carumba!
If for some reason you want to see this one for yourself, it's
If y'all wuz literat yood alredy no bout dis Sowth Ameracan masterpees. But I have bore witness to the proud lack of culture among the online swine long enough to know it's up to me to play teacher about any and all things worth knowing.
Gabriel Garcia Marquez is known as the father of the "magical realism" genre, mea...
2025-03-26 22:11:42 +0000 UTC View Post
It's true. I really did it. Of my own will and volition, I watched an anime. This one is hilarious, full of yummy food, and has the coolest chick in the world. What more even needs to be said? Nothing. That's what.
I ain't sayin nothin else cause I'm hangry for something delicious right now, so I'm gonna leave my dungeo...
2025-03-17 18:02:53 +0000 UTC View Post
This is one of the episodes everyone loves. Even normies remember it. A psychological deep dive into the twisted and ruined warzone of Helga's tormented mind. My tormented mind is held together and soothed by Hey Arnold, so I love and cherish every episode, but not everyone can be as oldschool and cool as me. 2025-03-17 14:25:31 +0000 UTC View Post
Daredevil lives in Hell's Kitchen, I live in Hell's toilet. Aside from that we basically have the same life. Here's a cool video where I tell you all about his critically acclaimed 2010 Mark Waid adventures, as collected in a big fat omnibus.
Beyond that, I ain't gonna write some long description here because Daredevil ...
2025-03-17 13:43:23 +0000 UTC View Post
Behold the Wrestle-Man in his natural habitat, the Wrestle-Room. I've been way behind on wrestle stuff because I was busy with all the silly little cartoons and animes you people were throwing at me. But I'm done with that baby stuff, and now it's time once again to talk about the only important thing in this pitiful world. T...
2025-03-15 13:58:00 +0000 UTC View Post
What an enlightening round of requests this was. I made no actual profit because I set it obscenely cheap and many of your requests were asinine, assy, Hellish, and Smellish. But this is the last, best, and Helliest of them all. So it gets the honor of a nice, normal, concise, and lucid review. The game is enough of a trip on...
2025-03-13 15:17:14 +0000 UTC View Post
To be clear, this is a review which happens to be extremely goofy of A Goofy Movie, not a review of An Extremely Goofy Movie, which is the inferior sequel that no one cares about.
A Goofy Movie isn’t just a
This month's Shudder Crud theme is women having a terrible time and going totally nuts. No I don't mean that in a sexist way, you chumps. I mean it in a totally rad and gnarly way. 3 films, 3 pretty girls, 3 really bad days. It could easily be 3,000 films, because women having a bad day is like 90 percent of horror movies. Pr...
2025-03-01 05:57:50 +0000 UTC View Post
Here's a very special double creature feature of fuck. I got 2 reviews in one here. That's 2 stinky movies i half watched, which equals 1 foul nightmare of fecal frights, and one cool dream my brain conjured up to escape from this filth.
Has there ever been a more bungled franchise than Jeepers Creepers? That first one ...
2025-03-01 04:48:27 +0000 UTC View Post
I heard about this one cause it had some wtf buzz online, so i thought I'd join the swarm and see what all the buzz is about, cuz. There's no way to really talk about the movie without spoiling it a little bit, but it definitely falls into the "oh shit oh no what the hell" category. It's a pretty good Oh shit movie.
Do...
2025-03-01 03:59:54 +0000 UTC View Post
This is the fastest I've disagreed with myself after recording something. This review of the Batman: The Animated Series pilot episode is mostly centered around hating Man-Bat. But as a pilot episode it really is quite good.
So much of this show's greatness was present from the very beginning, and while Man-Bat is<...
2025-02-28 23:23:15 +0000 UTC View Post
This may not be the most succinct or coherent "review" you've ever seen, but it's an oldskool Endless Jess experience, in the classic style of me. My review is that it's a fine film, and you should watch it. There. Now that the boring part is out of the way, here's a little film of my own, that onl...
2025-02-27 05:20:01 +0000 UTC View Post
Cowabunga, you buncha bungholes! Here's my lovely new talk show all about my favorite fungoids, the Ninja Turtles. Will there ever be more than one episode? I don't know, I don't care, and it doesn't matter!
My special guest on this first and only episode of Turtle Talk is... me. Today I'm talking about the new TMNT com...
2025-02-26 22:50:24 +0000 UTC View Post
This is the true rap. The Night Rap. Mista Thug Isolation is me and I am he. I am morose and lugubrious, and the lean got me fucked up.
Somehow these bars feel more relevant today than upon release. Doesn't it feel like the whole damn world is morose, lugubrious, and fucked up on lean these days? Lil Ugly Mane was a pro...
2025-02-04 19:19:48 +0000 UTC View Post
This movie was dumb as hell because of course it was. It's Sonic The Freaking Hedgehog 3. But someone just had to hear what I have to say about it. What even is there to say?
It's just Sonic, man. Everybody knows his whole deal. He goes fast, he's annoying, and his best friends are a gaybo and a dipshit. I'm on Robotni...
2025-02-03 22:42:57 +0000 UTC View Post
This is the inspirational tale of a boy who gets shot in the butthole and trapped in a whale. Lovingly animated by a passionate bunch of perverted psychos on brain-juice.
This flick has everything. Action, romance, big fat titties bouncing around, pretty colors exploding out of everything, and some kind of vaguely moti...
2025-02-02 20:06:42 +0000 UTC View Post
The Criterion streaming service is only for the real high brow stuff. By which i mean high brow like the people's eyebrow, raised charismatically at a big fat pair of attitude era Sable titties. That's what it's all about. That's what America is all about.
If you're not born and raised in the real USA, you wouldn't unde...
2025-02-01 05:54:49 +0000 UTC View Post
It's the return of everyone's favorite random movie reviews, mine. I have selected from my late night musings, a triple-feature of insane mania, 3 demented stories of mentally disturbed dummies doing fucked up shit.
These are freak films and maniac movies of madness and misery. Enjoy them if you can, study them to lear...
2025-02-01 04:17:02 +0000 UTC View Post
Finally, a good request for something cool and gnarly. Someone out there had the decency and wisdom to get me talking about Stereogram, the best thing to come out of New Zealand since Return of The King, which came out the previous year.
These guys ...
2025-02-01 00:02:32 +0000 UTC View Post
Here's the classic episode of Regular Show where someone finally stands up to the two devilish fiends, Dorkdecai and Bitchby. Those two ass clowns are the worst. But do you think they learn any kind of lesson here? Hell no. They're the eternal turds in the punchbowl of everyone else's fucking life.
Benson is king for te...
2025-01-27 16:34:30 +0000 UTC View Post
This is the story of the only TSA guy who's worth a shit and actually does his job, instead of just touching my butt and stealing my dry shampoo. It's a movie on Netflix that you can watch with your own eyes. What a fantastic invention. Movies, I mean. One of the only good things ever invented, and a lot of em are bad!
...
2025-01-26 19:09:24 +0000 UTC View Post
Welcome to Pissed Off Man Reviews Shit. This show is entirely too happy and cute for my current mood, so I tore it a new asshole. I was mean as Hell to it for no reason, and I regret nothing. I'll fuckin do it again.
I'm tired of watching girl shows and baby cartoons! From now on any colorful and campy slice-of-life sil...
2025-01-24 22:35:36 +0000 UTC View Post
Of course the first video game request i get has to be a 20 year old obscurity that I don't own and that Nintendo still thinks should be full price on their gay store. Don't worry, I got it running, I made it happen, and if i were a wealthy man I'd buy it and play it on the couch like God wants.
This is the story of a m...
2025-01-23 14:30:09 +0000 UTC View Post
Oh FUCK! Who cut the goddamn cheese in here, baby? Taste the forgotten fumes of an often overlooked Hey Arnold episode that's all about pissing and farting. Really and for real. This episode...
2025-01-23 00:22:16 +0000 UTC View Post
This Rat Requested a rock n roll record, any rock n roll record, by those ragamuffins who call themselves Green Day. I went the extra mile and spewed my stew on all the ones I've ever heard. That's almost half their discography, I think. This is probably the most accurate measure of how good a band Green Day is,...
2025-01-19 16:25:43 +0000 UTC View Post
The first of the Request Rats has spoken, and passed this basketball anime to me like me passing a basketball to Tucker. This is called The First Slam Dunk for some reason, despite it not being the first of anything, and in fact being the last part of a series I've never seen. I was assured that no-context was n...
2025-01-19 12:33:57 +0000 UTC View Post
Cowabunga you New Year Knuckleheads and Holiday Hose-Brains! I got something better for you to spend your money on than a gym membership you'll use once and never be able to cancel. Resolve instead to support quality entertainment, of your own refined selection.
Start 2025 off right by paying me f...
2025-01-11 21:21:05 +0000 UTC View Post
You didn't think you were safe from Mr. Goddamn Bean, did you? Nobody's making it to the New Year alive. You're all gonna drop dead of laughter from Bean's wild antics. If you thought what Kel did to the turkey was asinine, just you fucking wait to see the atrocity that Mr. Bean has cooked up for Christmas.
This man co...
2025-01-01 04:48:41 +0000 UTC View Post
Another year down the fucking shitter. Here's one last damn review of a piece of crap film about some gay ass bullshit. It's supposed to be a scary Santa film about a giant krampus monster, only it's not scary and doesn't actually have a Santa and the Krampus monster never even bothers coming out of his ice cube.
A poi...
2024-12-31 20:15:19 +0000 UTC View Post
